Keldeo the Critic- Season Three
by Matthais Unidostres
Summary: Say hi to Keldeo the Critic, and this summer, he's reviewing Pokemon Fanfiction when he's not training with the Swords of Justice. With a his loyal friends and occasional special guests, Keldeo will be putting out FanFic reviews and editorials for a Season of the best critiques of the highest quality! There will still NOT be any bashing or ranting.
1. Conquering the Dark PREVIEW- Part One

**_Special_****_ thanks to Jack Storm 448 for doing this collab review with me. Jack Storm 448 is the author of "Rising Storm- Book 1"_**

* * *

**_BOOOOOM!_**

A black wall was blown apart by Keldeo's Focus Blast.

_**Keldeo the Critic!**_

Keldeo activated his Secret Sword and swung it, causing the screen to burst.

Keldeo sprayed water from his hooves, using Hydro Pump to send Nature's Child Rosella blasting off.

Keldeo and Santa Paws screamed in horror as huge burst of dark purple energy erupted in front of them.

Ghost Pony Rider roared.

_**He reviews those Pokemon FanFics!**_

Kyurem and Cryogonal the Critics both screamed as a zombie Lucario with a chainsaw appeared on their TV.

Keldeo screamed in horror, but slapped himself to snap out of it.

Justinian was seated behind a desk in his study, with Keldeo standing on the other side.

_**Keldeo the Critic!**_

Mewtwo punched Mewtwo Girl in the face.

"FORESHADOWING!" Munna exclaimed.

"NO SHIP, SHERCLOCK!" the Intoxiquer shouted.

"Eww," Meloetta said.

"AHH!" Keldeo jumped back in shock as Rosella was now floating there.

_**So much to see and do!**_

Matthais Unidostres and BrickBrony1894 bro-hoofed.

_**For the FanFics he reviews!**_

Meloetta danced around and sang while dressed as Elsa from _Frozen_.

Sherclop Pones laughed demonically as his eyes glowed a demonic red.

Keldeo and Ryan the Lucario fought on a cliff top, Secret Sword and Bone Rush clashing over and over.

**_He's a Sword of Justice!_**

Button Mash and Sweetie Belle bonked heads as they tried playing _Wonderbolt Free Fliers._

Keldeo burst out of the ice encasing him in an explosion of light.

_**Keldeo the Critic!**_

Keldeo reared up on his hind legs, his expression serious and his Secret Sword raised and glowing brightly.

**Keldeo the Critic- Season Three**

******"Conquering the Dark" PREVIEW by**** AuraWielder**

Keldeo is back on the stone in the Moor of Icirrus lake. "It's me! Keldeo the Critic! I review Pokemon Fanfiction when I'm not training with the other Swords of Justice!" Keldeo smiled innocently and said, "Do you remember my review of Breaking the Chains?"

A large pan suddenly landed on Keldeo's head. His left eye twitched as the pan fell to the ground.

"I already apologized for part three of that review, okay!" Keldeo exclaimed in frustration, "Gosh! . . .Biscuits. . . Anyway, AuraWielder has started writing a sequel to that story, and I think it's just as good if not better! _Conquering the Dark!_"

* * *

_**Conquering the Dark**_

_By: AuraWielder _

_In a dark new world, all are to bow before Overlord Cyrus. Only the Resistance, who aims to overthrow him and refuse to bow, remains. And in the middle of the chaos, Riley and his Lucario Aaron are called upon to save this alternate reality from the Overlord Cyrus, Palkia, and Aaron himself. An AU fic and sequel to Breaking the Chains. Like BtC, it also contains Christian themes._

* * *

"The story isn't finished yet. Heck, it's hardly even begun. But I feel I have to check out what's occurred so far and what things are different from the first story. But I have to admit, _Conquering the Dark_ is kind of a harrowing exploring into the gloom and doom of an uncertain future caused by people who've made the wrong choices and life. And well, that makes me kinda nervous."

Keldeo sighed, "You know, I'd really appreciate someone to collab with right now, like those collabs I did with Ryan and Jordan. That would be nice, but I don't have anyone to do that with right now."

Suddenly, a swirling blue portal opened up right behind Keldeo, and out of it tumbled a human boy with ragged golden hair, and a jacket with a lightning bolt on the back.

"GAH!" Keldeo shouted in shock, shying away from the human.

"Ouch," the boy groaned from the floor, "What just... Where am I?"

Keldeo blinked as he studied the person with his eyes, "Wait. . .are you Jack Storm?"

"Ugh, who wants to... Oh; it's you, Keldeo." Jack got up and surveyed his surroundings, "Okay, two questions; where am I, and how did I get here?"

Keldeo shrugged, "Well first, you're in Unova, in the Moor of Icirrus. As for how you got here, I really don't know. Maybe you fell through a Magnagate or something? What were you doing before you got here?"

"Sleeping," Jack dead-panned, "It was the middle of the night in Sinnoh."

"Middle of the night?" Keldeo asked, "Well, you dropped in here at an odd time then."

"Speaking of which," Jack said, suddenly interested, "What were you doing before I fell into existence?"

"Oh, well I was just about to start a FanFiction Review," Keldeo's eyes widened, and he smiled, "Hey. . .do you wanna review it with me? Maybe comment on the event in the story with me? It has a Lucario in it!"

Jack thought for a moment, then a smile crossed his face, "Well, since I'm here... Just give me a minute to don my 'traditional' apparel."

With that, Jack grabbed his bag, which had fallen on the ground beside him, and walked off-screen.

"Um, okay, you go do that." Keldeo smiled, "Alright then, reviewing this story with me today is the human who was raised by a Lucario family, from Rising Storm, give it up for Jack Storm!"

Jack ran back on-screen, in his trademark blue robes. He then waved to the audience, "Hi, Mom!"

"Okay then, Jack. Are you ready to take journey. . ." Keldeo's eyes widened and his voice echoed mysteriously, "INTO THE FUTURE. . "

Jack cracked his knuckles, "Definitely. I just have one question."

"Ask away."

"Exactly what are we reviewing?"

* * *

_Conquering the Dark_

_Chapter 1: A Dark New World_

* * *

"A tale of an dark alternate future, 'Conquering the Dark' by AuraWielder," Keldeo explained.

"We start off with the three main villains of this story."

* * *

_"So… how are things fairing along? The prisoner, what is of him?"_

_Those were the words that World Leader Cyrus had to ask. He sat on his remarkable throne of shining white, with the colors of the throne contrasting greatly with his black cape ever since he had quite literally become the King of the World. He smiled a bit to himself, something he rarely ever did as he reminisced of how the world came to be his. Only a few fleeting thoughts were generated in his head before he quickly brought himself back to reality._

_"Well, Commander?" he asked again, before a large, and rather intimidating Lucario. Of course, he was not intimidated in the slightest. But he had no reason to be. After all, the Lucario served him, not vice versa._

_"Of course, master." the Lucario nodded. "An update. We have detained the prisoner and he is currently in his jail cell. We have tried interrogating him upon the whereabouts of the Resistance, but he is adamant about refusing to confess."_

_"The Resistance…" the King thought to himself. They were the only thing left standing in his way. Sure, he already had every nation bow to him. Kanto, Johto, Hoenn, Sinnoh, Unova, and Kalos… but what did it mean if some simply refused to bow? And worse yet, some of those that refused to bow formed their own resistance, aiming to take down Cyrus. Cyrus himself knew it was impossible for him to be overthrown, but the discovery of the Resistance bugged him. Since then, he vowed to find them, and make absolute certain of two things. The first would be to have them submit and acknowledge him as their lord. The second would be to kill those that refused. But that would be a matter of when, not if, he would find them._

_"You've tried torture, haven't you?" Cyrus said aloud._

_"Tried it." a disappointed Palkia sighed, coming in from the hallway. "He screams, but nothing else comes out of his mouth."_

* * *

"And right away, I can tell that Cyrus is the mastermind; this guy practically radiates evil," Jack said.

"NO SHIP, SHERLOCK!" Keldeo exclaimed comically, but then he blushed nervously and said, "Um. . .I was quoting the Intoxiquer. . .he's a Crobat. . .he's friends with Genesect. . .uh, never mind. Anyway, if you think Cyrus is bad, check out Palkia's character!"

* * *

_Palkia nodded. He walked from the entrance of the hallway to the step of Cyrus' throne, which was quite the long distance. Similar to Cyrus, he reminisced about everything he had done to get into this position of power._

_Power. It was all he wanted, really. Money and riches never meant much to him. Power was what he craved. It was his love, his passion, and his addictive drug. He thought back to what he had done to attain all of this power. He betrayed his mother, the powerful deity Arceus. His betrayal helped stir Cyrus' own plans of power into motion. He had gathered the material necessary to create the Red Chain, the only thing that could enslave Arceus, all in exchange for more power, more say, and more dominance than his mother. He was relatively happy with the position he was in right now. As the official 'punishment deliverer' (or simply the top torturer), he had more power than Arceus would have ever agreed to give him. He held his power and dominance over every disobedient and rebellious slave. He had just come back from torturing the prisoner, disappointed that he hadn't spilled any information regarding the Resistance._

* * *

"That is one seriously disturbed Pokemon..." Jack stopped short, "Wait a second; what did he just say?"

* * *

_He betrayed his mother, the powerful deity Arceus._

* * *

Jack angrily powered up an Aura Sphere in his hand, before taking several deep breaths and calming down.

"Okay, I'll let the 'deity' thing pass, but it drives me up the wall when people portray Arceus as female."

Keldeo shyed away from the Aura Sphere, "Gah! Put that thing away!"

* * *

_"So… both of you say that the prisoner have refused to reveal any information, correct?" Cyrus inquired. "Not even after torture?"_

_"That would be correct, master." the Commander nodded._

_"…Then I believe you know what to do. The prisoner shall have the same fate as that of Zekrom. Go to it immediately, Commander Aaron." the King ordered._

* * *

"So, anyway, the conversation ends with Cyrus telling the Commander to take care of their prisoner like they did Zekrom. Wow, they managed to catch Zekrom. But then, we get a look into the Commander's tragic past."

_**Anakin Skywalker:** "I killed them. . .I killed them all."_

"Uh, no, not like that."

* * *

_Flashback_

_"Mommy…Daddy…where are you?"_

_He was lost. Lost in the fire that flooded the valley. He ran through the valley looking for them._

_"Mommy! Daddy!" he cried to them. "What's happening?"_

_There was no answer._

_"Where are you?"_

_Silence. Throughout the entire valley._

_"Help me!"_

_After an eternity of searching, he came across their two lifeless bodies. Burnt to death by the fire…_

* * *

"I have to admit," Jack said, "I can't help but feel sorry for the guy when I read that. Unfortunately, the feeling passes quickly."

* * *

_Shortly after the deaths of his parents, he was kidnapped by Team Galactic, the same people who burnt down the Green Valley, where the large Lucario community used to live. The location was long forgotten now. Team Galactic did many cruel things to him as a Riolu, and even as a Lucario after a forced evolution. But all of this torture stopped when Cyrus made him an offer. Join Team Galactic, or continue to suffer. At first, he wanted to refuse and have nothing to do with the evil man. But upon being offered power… power beyond his wildest dreams… and the promise to help him conquer the world… he seized the chance. Since the fateful day where Aaron had accepted the offer to join, he had been treated with much less cruelty. His evil ambitions were propelled further when Palkia joined up with Team Galactic, with the power of Arceus in his, Palkia's, and Cyrus' hands. He hadn't regretted the decision to join Team Galactic at all, satisfied with his position as the Commander of Cyrus' army. Getting to torture uncooperative prisoners was just a nice bonus._

* * *

"Well, we've yet to see what the Commander can really do. So we follow him as he meets up with their prisoner who happens to be Rayquaza."

_**Rayquaza**: "This is punishment for trashing LaRousse City, isn't it?"_

* * *

_The Commander stepped closer to Rayquaza, with the Legendary unable to do anything to propel or force him back. He placed his paw on the Legendary's head, sending psychic waves of energy into his mind, and altering everything that Rayquaza believed in. Rayquaza jerked around as he tried to force the thoughts out of his mind, but to no avail._

_"You don't belong to the Resistance anymore." Lucario stated as a fact. "You obey our Empire. You obey me. You obey your lord, Cyrus. You are my soldier, and will do as I say."_

_Rayquaza jerked around even more violently underneath the chains, trying his hardest to break them, and trying to eject the manipulative thoughts and powerful suggestions out of his head._

_"I am your master, and Cyrus is your lord." Commander Aaron stated again, harshly re-enforcing those thoughts back into Rayquaza. "You are my obedient soldier, and you worship and obey the Empire."_

_"N…No." he whimpered, with his will weakening. His heart and soul truly did not want to give it to this manipulative and evil brainwashing, but the psychic powers altered the heart and soul themselves. His mind was slowly starting to give in, as tears formed in Rayquaza's eyes._

_"That's it." Commander Aaron smiled, caressing his head as the brainwashing completed as the tears in Rayquaza's eyes dried out. "You are my soldier, my slave, and… you belong to me."_

* * *

Keldeo shrugged, "Well this makes sense, because Lucario is a Psychic-type. . ." Keldeo blinked and frowned, "Oh wait. . .no he's not-HOW THE HAY IS HE DOING THAT!?"

"I know! Right?" Jack agreed, "And remember what I said about me not feeling sorry for him for long? This scene is why."

* * *

_"Yes... Master."_

* * *

Jack shivers, "I have to admit, that gives me the creeps for some reason. Fortunately, that scene is over now, and we move on to..."

* * *

_"Keldeo, you need to remain calm and focus. You'll never hit your target if you thrash wildly in frustration."_

_A sigh of annoyance was heard. "Yes, Xerneas."_

* * *

"Oh, hey; it's you, Keldeo!"

* * *

_Xerneas and Keldeo were out in the practice fields. Located about half a mile away from the main headquarters of the Resistance, it was used as a training ground by the members. Right now, Xerneas was battling Keldeo, using less of his normal power to help train him._

* * *

Keldeo didn't seem to hear Jack at all. He seemed to be completely captivated by something.

"Oh my gosh, Xerneas. . ." Keldeo gasped out, looking totally star struck, "Xerneas is SO awesome."

* * *

_"Now, listen again. Your goal is to be able to strike me down and leave me helpless. As you know, I am a Fairy-type. Dragon moves will not work against me, and I am also super effective against your Fighting-type. Tell me Keldeo… what is the best way to defeat an enemy that has an advantage over you? You don't have any Steel or Poison moves."_

_Keldeo thought for a moment. "Well… if I don't have any Steel or Poison moves, and if Fighting-type moves aren't effective against Fairy-types, then wouldn't a Water-type move be my best option?"_

_Xerneas nodded. "Indeed, it would. However, if you do find yourself trapped in a situation you cannot win, then there is no shame in fleeing to save your life."_

* * *

"Xerneas is so wise. . ." Keldeo said as his eyes grew big and sparkly as gazed at the bigger Legendary Pokemon.

Jack let out a small laugh, "Well folks, I think we've found his weakness. Hold on, wait a second; why is Xerneas training AU-Keldeo anyway? Where are the other Swords of Justice..."

* * *

_Keldeo scowled at the sound of this. "I'm not running away! I'd be a coward! The last time I did that…"_

* * *

"Oh no; don't tell me..."

* * *

_Flashback_

_"Keldeo, wake up." said a voice._

_Keldeo slowly blinked his eyes and stood up. "Terrakion? Virizion? It's the middle of the night. Why…?"_

_"We don't have time to explain. We'll tell you on the way." Terrakion stated, urging the young colt to follow him._

_It wasn't until Keldeo got outside of the cave did he know what was going on. The entire Moor of Icirrus was on fire, burning away everything that Keldeo knew and loved. The three began to gallop out of the area, planning to find a safer area in Unova. "V-Virizion?"_

_"Yes, Keldeo?"_

_"W-What's going on? Why is our home on fire? Who would…?"_

* * *

Keldeo snapped out of his trance and tilted his head to the side. "Wait, what's happening?"

* * *

_The Lucario chuckled, with his eyes as red as blood and his laugh being a very dark and cruel laugh. "In a few words… I am Commander Aaron… and your ultimate end."_

_He swiftly charged up a glowing red Aura Sphere almost to signify that the attack itself had a ruthless, evil aura, and aimed at Terrakion. Keldeo, the first to react, ran towards the Lucario in an attempt to stop him from attacking. But the attack was in futile effort. It barely made a scratch on the powerful Lucario as he painfully smacked Keldeo aside, and he fired his Aura Sphere towards Terrakion._

_Terrakion flared up in anger. "Don't you dare do that to him! I'll show you whose end is coming! Sacred Sword!"_

_Terrakion quickly charged his most powerful attack, and swung at the Aura Sphere to counter it back towards the Lucario._

_But it didn't work. The attack that he had always relied on failed him. A painful shattering sound was heard as the Aura Sphere broke through his Sacred Sword counter. Terrakion took the entire force of the hit, and was sent flying backwards into a stone cold rock._

_"Terrakion!" Keldeo shouted in horror. He ran towards Terrakion as fast as he could, but the Lucario was even faster. The Commander used ExtremeSpeed to get over to the fallen Sword of Justice before Keldeo could. The sound that Terrakion's neck made would never leave Keldeo._

_*snap*_

_The sound of that, along with his lifeless eyes, emotionally broke Keldeo, tears forming in his eyes. Looking at Keldeo and then the Lucario, Virizion knew what she had to do. She wasn't going to make it out of this alive, but would make sure that Keldeo would._

_"Run!" she ordered._

_Keldeo tried to weakly protest. "B-But…"_

_"RUN! NOW!"_

_Keldeo stood there for a moment horrified and whimpered, before following Virizion's orders. As he ran, Keldeo knew that Virizion wasn't going to get out of there alive either._

* * *

"WORSE THAN ZALTON! HE'S WORSE THAN ZALTON!" Keldeo shouted in a blind rage, appearing ready to attack wildly at any moment. But as the flashback went on and on, Keldeo's rage gave way to shock and he began to fall into a traumatized catatonic state.

Jack flinched, "And I thought _'I'_ got upset. We'll be right back, folks; I think Keldeo needs some therapy."

* * *

_**KELDEO **_

_**THE CRITIC**_

_We'll be right back after these messages!_


	2. Commerical 1

Hello, everypony, Matthais Unidostres here.

There is a reviewer called Confused Matthew on the internet, and after watching many of his reviews, I discovered that I resonated with his unique style, as well as his general mindset. While he's is confused about movies, I get confused about My Little Pony Fanfiction, and thus have decided to review FimFiction on my YouTube Channel. I even adapted the Confused Matthew themesong.

Now, what exactly am I confused about? How any of these flawed fanfiction stories became so popular! Well, _some_ of them anyway. After reviewing the dreaded _"Sweetie's Mansion," _a fanfic that everyone seems to love but me, I have expanded my horizons a bit, and review a bit of everything.

My Reviews deal with those fanfics that have been wildly successful yet still have glaring problems in my eyes. "_The Sweetie Mash Chronicles,"_ by Justice4243, "_The 'Death' of Button Mash" _by Rated PonyStar, _"Empty Darkness" _by Giga Bowser NS, etc. However, I won't just negatively review them. I actually think these fanfics are okay, in fact. The style of my "Confused Matthew-like" reviews is to emphasize the bad points to make you see what I see. In other words, don't take my criticism too seriously. I don't hate these Fan Fics. My reviews are practically _parodies_ of Confused Matthew! I am more than aware that most will not share my point of view, but I hope I am at least successful in explaining why the problems are so big to me. However, in all likelihood it'd be best to just take my reviews with a grain of salt and watch them for entertainment.

However, I will also make videos about my favorite FimFiction, and those are the opposite of my other reviews. These deal with FimFiction that has gotten my attention in a good way! To me, these stories are the best FimFiction ever made on the site and need lots more love. _"Icarus' and "Scootaloo in Cloudsdale" _by Tamar_, "Gift of the Mash"_ by Rated PonyStar,_ "Hope From the Future" _by majinvegeta86, and "_The Secventh Star" _by Mr. Page; just to name a few.

Now, I'm actually NOT going to review _really_ bad Fan Fictions, because if I did, things would get ugly. For example, if I were to review _Gutterloo _by jmj, I'd get angry and. . . . .actually forget it, I really shouldn't even think about it. No reviews of really bad Fan Fics on my site. I want to keep myself positive after the whole _"Equestria Games" _affair.

Other reviews and projects can be found as well. I hope you enjoy my reviews, even if you do not always agree with them.

See you on YouTube. This is Matthais Unidostres signing off!


	3. Conquering the Dark PREVIEW- Part Two

_**Keldeo the Critic!**_

Keldeo reared up on his hind legs, his expression serious and his Secret Sword raised and glowing brightly.

**Keldeo the Critic- Season Three**

**"Conquering the Dark" PREVIEW by AuraWielder**

"Okay, everyone, we're back. How are you feeling, Keldeo?" Jack asked the Colt Pokemon next to him, who was currently shaking water out of his mane.

Keldeo now looks calmer, and he nods slowly. "You know what saves this scene for me," he said calmly, "This. . ."

* * *

_Staying in the shadows, he looked around for a ship, any ship that would lead out of Unova to somewhere safe. Finally, he came across a pile of cargo, with a small 'To Sinnoh' sign set next to it. Seeing this as his chance to get out, he quietly lifted open a box and crawled inside it, shutting it behind him._

_He walked around the large cargo hold, unaware of what he would do once he got to Sinnoh. His entire life as he knew it was gone. In just one night, everything he loved had been taken away from him. Hours seemed to pass as the trip dragged on._

_"If… if anyone's out there… God… please… help me. I… I beg you. Please…"_

_What seemed like another eternity passed before he heard a knock on the ship windows right next to the cargo hold. "Wait… how is that possible? The ship's still moving…" Regardless, he headed up a pair of metal stairs to get to the source of the sound._

_Looking through the window, his jaw dropped at seeing a Pokémon looking at him. Not just any old Water-type Pokémon either, it was a majestic deer that Keldeo had never seen before in his life, floating over the water._

_"Who… who are you?" Keldeo asked._

_The deer smiled, before teleporting into the cargo hold right next to Keldeo, startling him._

_"How did you even know that I'm here?!"_

_The deer smiled again. "A friend of mine, a very powerful Psychic-type, had detected the presence of another Legendary entering Sinnoh. Knowing how dangerous Sinnoh is now, I had decided to investigate."_

_ "I… I lost my family." Out of rash impulse, he hugged Xerneas, needing someone to comfort him. Quickly realizing what he had done, he backed off._

_"I… I apologize." Keldeo said flustered. "I-I wasn't…"_

_"It's OK." Xerneas reassured him. "We all need a shoulder to cry on sometimes. I lost a brother very close to me as well. I am… very familiar with losing loved ones. But I need to discuss the reason why I am here."_

_"Yeah… I'm wondering about that."_

_"However, this is not the place for it. I need to get you off of here as quickly as possible."_

_"But why?"_

_"Sinnoh is a very dangerous place now, as I have said before. The ship is about to land, so I have no time to explain right now. I will give details later."_

_"But…"_

_Before Keldeo could protest, Xerneas did what was best for their safety and teleported them both off of the ship._

* * *

"This kinda reminds me of those Scootalove My Little Pony fanfics that have Rainbow Dash being there for Scootaloo," Keldeo said with a soft smile.

Jack nodded thoughtfully, "Actually, yeah; I do get that feeling. And also, I really like how you... alternate-universe-you, actually prays; to God. I always like to see some good Christian themes in quality fanfiction."

"So, back in the present, Xerneas get a report from that very powerful Psychic-type he mentioned earlier," Keldeo said.

* * *

_"How goes it, Mewtwo?" Xerneas asked._

_"Playing double-agent is always such a stress." Mewtwo confessed. "But I managed to get some more key info. Specifically on Rayquaza."_

_Xerneas had a look of worry on his face. "I… haven't seen him for a couple of days. Please don't tell me that…"_

_Mewtwo nodded solemnly. "Yes. Yesterday, I was asking that… pathetic Commander of mine if any new slaves have been captured for… 'reprogramming'." he said, shuddering at the mention of the word. "He informed me that there was a recent captive that he had obtained. It was indeed Rayquaza. He really seemed to gloat about the capture, too. It sickens me that I even have to PRETEND to work for this bastard."_

_"I guess it would be the best decision to inform Dialga about this. I can't believe that we've lost two members now."_

* * *

"It looks like the Resistance has a mon on the inside; it's a good thing too, as it seems that Rayquaza wasn't the only member to be 'Reprogrammed'. And... wait a cotton-picking minute; not again!" Jack said angrily.

* * *

_"I will go inform Dialga and then she can call for an emergency meeting."_

* * *

Jack took a few deep breaths, "Did I mention that I hate it when people do that? Like Arceus, DIALGA IS MALE! Lecture over."

"Well, you can't expect the average human to figure out a Legendary's gender too easily," Keldeo shrugged, "It's not like humans can understand. . .whoops. . .uh, nevermind!" Keldeo gave Jack an innocent smile.

_**Bathound:**__"Nice recovery. . .real smooth. . ."_

"Anyway, so we learn that Zekrom has also been captured, gosh poor Reshiram, and then we get a look into this world's Resistance."

Jack rolled his eyes at Keldeo's slip-up, and hasty cover-up, "And what a resistance there is; along with Xerneas, Keldeo, and Mewtwo, there's also Groudon, Kyogre, Darkrai, Dialga, and Reshiram. Unfortunately, it seems that as they get weaker, their enemies get stronger."

* * *

_"Now, I hope you are all aware that I have called this meeting due to the most important of matters."_

_"Please don't tell me… someone got captured." Groudon muttered in worry._

_Dialga nodded solemnly. "Indeed. According to our double-agent Mewtwo, Rayquaza has been captured by Galactic and… 'reprogrammed'."_

_The table went silent. All of them, except for the new Keldeo, knew what being 'reprogrammed' meant. You were stripped entirely of your previous life. Every memory of who you are gets locked away, never to be retrieved again. You are given new 'meaning', becoming a mindless slave for them. Commander Aaron in particular, has mastered the art of 'reprogramming' implementing powerful aura 'suggestions' into the victim's brain. No one to the group's knowledge had ever been able to break the Commander's 'reprogramming'. Rayquaza was now the second victim to this horrific act._

* * *

"Luckily, they get a new idea from Mister Rogers' super genius long lost brother," Keldeo said.

* * *

_"I was thinking… about Everett's interpretation of quantum mechanics. If I may, I would like to discuss my thoughts."_

_Everyone looked at N with a blank expression on their faces, having no idea what he was talking about. The group never understood N's scientific ramblings, though his thoughts caught the attention of Mewtwo, the other intellectual of the group. "Dialga, I think we should listen to him. I think I know where he's going with this."_

_Dialga shrugged. "At this point, I'm open to any suggestion. You can continue, N."_

_"Thank you." N nodded. "As I was saying, I was thinking about Everett's interpretation of quantum mechanics. As this theory's core, for every crucial decision made, an alternate universe is born. For example, say Commander Aaron wasn't evil. Say that instead of turning to evil, he was a good guy."_

* * *

Jack thought about this, "N... I don't recognise that kind of Pokémon, but he sure is brilliant. Although, I'll be honest; 'erased from existence', doesn't sound too pleasant."

Keldeo blinked and said, "Uh. . .N is a human, actually."

Jack stood with a stunned expression on his face for a second, before shaking his head, "I'll get that story later. Anyway; so, Dialga agrees to test N's theory."

* * *

_Mewtwo said to the green-haired man. "One of two things could happen. The best case scenario if the theory is wrong would be you simply getting booted back into this universe. But the worst case scenario… you could end up erased from existence."_

_Notable controversy was stirred up from the rest of the Legendaries, arguing whether or not this theory should be tested out. Groudon claimed that this could be a significant help to the Resistance, while Kyogre argued that if the theory was wrong, Dialga could be killed. Dialga herself, however, was still debating over it. Finally, she came to her decision._

_"I'm going to try this." Dialga stated._

_"But Dialga-" Kyogre tried to refute._

_"I have made my decision. I will leave as soon as possible. Until I get back… if I do get back, Xerneas will be in charge."_

_"Of course, ma'am." Xerneas nodded in understanding._

_"Good." she said, leaving the presentation room. Everyone followed Dialga outside the headquarters as she opened a time portal. "I haven't done this in forever." she muttered to herself. She couldn't help but feel worried that she actually could be wiped from existence. Still, she shook the feeling aside. She had to be strong. She was the leader and founder of the Resistance, after all._

* * *

"Hang on a minute!" Keldeo exclaimed, "Where's Celebi during all this? I mean, Dialga is one of their most powerful fighters. If they loose Dialga, then it's all over. Now, I'm not saying that they should sacrifice Celebi, no, not at all, but sending Celebi is a better risk. So, what, is Celebi dead? Or is she just hiding like a coward instead of doing her part? The Celebi in the second Mystery Dungeon game did more than the one in this story!"

"I don't know, but it seems likely that Celebi might have been a casualty of the war. What I don't get is this; why does time travel allow access to different versions of reality? Isn't that more Giratina's department?" Jack asked.

"Well that all depends," Keldeo said, and he pulled down a screen from above him which depicted a complicated diagram of boxes and arrows with labels like "real world prime", "reverse world prime", "real world beta", "reverse world beta," and so on and so on.

Keldeo cleared his throat and pointed to the diagram, "Ya see, Giratina lives in the Reverse World, which coexists with the real world. But he only travels between those two worlds, meaning that there should be alternative real world-reverse world pairs that are parallel to our real world-reverse world pair with alternate Giratinas. . ." Keldeo blinked at the diagram and said flatly, "Um, you _are_ following this, right?"

"Yeah, I have a good head for this kind of stuff. The thing is, that even if Giratina can only travel between those two dimensions, if you're going to make up a thing like that, making Dialga's time-travel powers the key makes less sense than making it a Girantina thing instead."

"Well, Giratina isn't the most agreeable Legendary anyway." Keldeo then suddenly drifted into a memory. . .

_("I JUST WANTED TO TRAIN WITH YOU!" Keldeo exclaimed in fear as he ran away from an angry looking Giratina.)_

. . . .Back in the present, Keldeo shuddered, "Uhhh. . .Giratina makes Kyurem look like a cute little Eevee!"

"Yeah, I guess when you consider that... Anyway, this buneary-trail was nice, but it's time to get back to the story. And it only get's better from here on out."

Keldeo raised an eyebrow, "Better? Really? How do you know-?"

* * *

_"Come on, Aaron! Stop being so cheap!"_

_"It's not cheap; it's strategic planning."_

_"I fail to see how spamming Aura Storm over and over again qualifies as 'strategic planning'."_

_Riley had just off from work, able to find a good, steady job at the Iron Island mines, mining for iron with Aaron's assistance. It wasn't his first option for a job, but it paid decently enough, and he really couldn't complain. Riley and his Lucario Aaron had decided to play a quick round of Brawl. The match was over quickly with 'Lucario' soundly defeating 'Marth'. _

* * *

Keldeo instantly perked up and his blue pony tail started wagging, "Smash Bros.! Yeah! Smash Bros.! I LOVE Smash Bros.!"

_An advertisement for Super Smash Bros. Wii U suddenly appeared, showing Lucario tossing a Pokeball out onto the Pokemon Stadium Stage. Keldeo came out of the Pokeball and swung his sacred sword._

_"Keldeo! The Colt Pokemon!" the Announcer said, "Find him in Pokeballs in Super Smash Bros Wii U, coming Winter of 2014!"_

The screen shatters, and Jack is standing with an Aura Sphere in his hand, "Okay, with that little commercial out of the way, let's plunge ahead. Here we see Aaron and Riley from AuraWielder's other story, in their natural habitat. You know, this Riley character is another human I'm going to have to read up on."

* * *

_Riley turned off the console, leaning back into the couch. He relaxed his muscles, having been worn out by the mining. Smiling, Aaron went behind the couch and started to massage Riley's shoulders._

_"Oh! Oh… that feels good… Thanks, Aaron."_

_"Not an issue." he replied. "I'm always glad to help. Mining seems to be much more strenuous on humans than it is for Lucarios."_

_"Well, even learning advanced aura techniques can't help me there." Riley responded._

_"Yeah… you know, this feels a little familiar." Aaron spoke._

_"Really? How so?"_

_"Well, only in a minor way to be honest. But I'm reminded of you taking care of me. You've always taken care of me since day one. Remember that?"_

* * *

"I hear he's friends with Ash," Keldeo said, "I heard that they fought Team Galactic on Iron Island in the Sinnoh Region. But that's another story. Speaking of another story, '_Breaking the Chains'_ tells us all about Riley and Good!Aaron. It's a long story filled with torture, pain, friendship, family, and revenge, but the quick exposition the story gives us is pretty good."

* * *

_8 years had passed since 'Day One'. 'Day One' was a new chapter in Aaron's dark life. He had been kept captured by Team Galactic for the majority of his life, since he was a small Riolu. He managed to pull off a miracle of an escape when Team Galactic tried to use his strong aura to bring a being known as "Project Alpha" to life, headed by a "Doctor Anderson". Being held captive in what amounted to a prison for most of his life made Aaron a traumatized and apprehensive Lucario, vulnerable emotionally and scared to death of retaliation. But the day of his escape, and the day he met Riley, would be forever known as "Day One"._

_He learned that there were caring and kind human beings in the world._

_He learned to become unafraid of an abusive retaliation._

_And he learned to have a family again._

_Once Team Galactic had been arrested for trying to bring Dialga, Palkia, and Giratina under their command, Cyrus had been dragged into the Distortion World-_

* * *

Suddenly, Munna flew in and she and Keldeo sang the Exposition Song.

_"Ex-po-sition! Ex-po-sition! Pump it out! AS - AP!"_

Jack blinked as Munna flew away, "Okay; that happened. Well, then we see... Hey; it's Maylene and Lucas!"

* * *

_Nick and Magnus stood at opposite ends of the backyard, ready to begin their tiebreaker. Lucas, a Lucario with a passion for battling, stood as referee. He recited the rules, just like an announcer. "Magnus has won the first round, while Nick has won the second. This match is the tiebreaker, and whoever wins the overall challenge! And gets a foot massage from Maylene!"_

_Maylene, who was relaxing in the corner, widened her eyes. "Hey! I never agreed to that!"_

_"Alright!" Nick smiled, enthusiastic as ever. "Let's do this!"_

_"Hmm. Eager like a child as always, aren't you Nick? That enthusiasm will prove to be your downfall." Magnus smirked._

* * *

Keldeo perked up excitedly, "Yep. Word on the street is that you and your team had an EPIC battle with her team recently! Wish I could've been there to see it in person. . . so anyway, it's Nick vs Magnus. We got a good backstory for Magnus right here, but if you really wanna know Nick's cool backstory, check out _Past Transgressions._ But for now, think Cynder after being freed from Malefor. . ." Keldeo then smiled in slight embarrassment, "Although, for the record, I was also considering Luna after being turned back form Nightmare Moon. . . Whatever. It's time for a Pokemon Battle!"

* * *

_Lucas began the countdown. "Three! Two! One! Go!"_

_Nick dashed up to the Metagross, leapt on top of him, and Crunched down hard onto him. Even though Magnus was made of metal, Nick's powerful teeth easily left a dent in Metagross._

_Magnus quickly focused his mind, and relaxed his steel body. He levitated into the air with Magnet Rise, and moved over to Nick. He aimed one of his claws at Nick and pounded him with Meteor Mash. Nick reeled back from the hit, but remained standing. The two of them were also slow, yet heavy hitters, so they didn't have the speed to dodge quickly._

_Magnus, however, increased his movement speed by using Agility, allowing him to move faster while he levitated. Nick attempted to use Stone Edge to knock Magnus off-balance, but the Metagross deftly dodged all of the oncoming stones. As he dodged, he levitated back to Nick and thrust a Hammer Arm into his chest. The move proved to be super effective, as Nick was knocked to the ground unable to counter. He tried to get up, but flopped back down to the ground in exhaustion._

_"Nick is unable to resume battle! Magnus is the victor!" Lucas declared._

_"Time for that massage!" Magnus smirked. "My legs are a bit sore after that match."_

_Maylene's jaw opened, not believing this. "You're joking! You… You have metal feet… claws… things! I'd break my hands!"_

_Magnus rolled his eyes. "Maylene, relax. I'm just joking with you."_

* * *

"That was a pretty good, if short, sparring match. And now we are introduced to Bridgette, a female Blaziken," Jack said.

* * *

_Bridgette was an interesting Blaziken to be sure, with an interesting story behind her as well. Maylene had received her as a Torchic with Speed Boost as a gift from her father on her birthday a few years back. It was an apology gift from her father for all of the trouble his gambling addiction had caused, which was now thankfully broken. She trained the Torchic herself, to raise her to be a contender for her gym team. Lucas had even helped, and that Torchic eventually evolved into a full Blaziken, who Lucas quickly developed a crush on. And after an awkward asking, Bridgette became Lucas's girlfriend, and Lucas had achieved his wish of having a girl to love._

* * *

Jack snickered, "Looks like Lucas isn't as impenetrable as he'd like the universe to think. But, hold on a second..."

* * *

_He smiled, pecking her on the lips._

* * *

Jack sighed, "Blaziken is a very human-like Pokémon in shape and size; it has two eyes, two legs, two arms, it even has hair! And do you know what else it has; a bird's beak! Lecture over."

Keldeo snickered, "If you think that's bad, check out all the _Sonic Riders _fanfiction. He then smiled and said, "And yeah. . .AuraWeidler likes to take liberties with Pokemon Physiology. For instance, Lucario's apparently have small pocket pouch skin things on their sides."

Jack winced, "I didn't catch that one, but I can assure you; they have no such things. Anyway, moving on."

* * *

_Bridgette laughed. "Hey there, Lucas. Happy to see me, huh?"_

_"Of course I'm happy to see my girlfriend. For someone with Speed Boost, you'd think you'd be on time." he smiled, pecking her on the lips. "Now we can get started on lunch."_

_"I was only late by 5 minutes." Bridgette shrugged. "Would've been here on time, but I ran into a couple of thugs as I left the pizza place. Gave them a really good old fashioned butt-kicking."_

_Lucas smiled, taking the pizza from her and setting it on the table. "That's my girlfriend for you." he bragged a bit._

* * *

"Alright, I just met this character and she's already my favorite character, how did she do that? Or should I say: how did AuraWielder do that?" Keldeo said incredulously.

_"Go! Go! Poke-Ranger! You Fire-Fighting-Type Blaze Mighty Mega Evolving Poke-Ranger!"_

"I have to admit, she kind of reminds me of Katana," Jack observed, "However, we don't get much time to focus on the new arrival; this is where it gets... interesting."

* * *

_*CRASH!*_

_Everyone in the entire house jumped in fright and then stood still. A giant, powerful crash had just happened in what now probably used to be a backyard._

_The group had walked into the backyard, which was now a giant crater. Riley didn't really bother complaining about his ruined backyard, as he saw a large metallic blue dragon getting up from the crater. Riley recognized the creature immediately from the legends that Cynthia frequently shared with him._

_"DIALGA?!"_

* * *

Keldeo blinked, "What the hay- what's with the crash landing? What, did he turn into The Greatest American Hero?"

_(The first one who gets and can fully explain that reference will be able to suggest whatever fanfic they want)_

"So Dialga explains the dire situation his world is in and how she needs Aaron to help stop Evil!Aaron. And they all agree to help . . .rather quickly. . ." Keldeo said slowly.

* * *

_"In the universe where I reside from, it appears that you had little to no faith. You surrendered to Team Galactic very quickly, though I don't know how long exactly. And… you teamed up with Team Galactic. You joined them."_

_Aaron's jaw was already on the ground, but Dialga was nowhere near done with her explanation._

_"It doesn't stop there. You were promoted to second-in-command, and you, Cyrus, and my brother Palkia all made the agreement to enslave my mother… Arceus."_

_"A-Arceus?!" Bridgette exclaimed in surprise. "How is… how is that even possible?!"_

_"They created the Red Chain, which tried to enslave me and Palkia the first time. That didn't work, obviously. After Cyrus had been cast into the Distortion World, Palkia had come to rescue him. They then recreated it a second time to enslave Arceus. And it worked this time. My mother has had to act against her will to give those three everything they desired. And now, my universe is ruled by this dictator. I formed a Resistance to try to stand up to Cyrus, but we've already lost thee members, two of which are now brainwashed into Cyrus' army… and that's why I'm here. To put a stop to this."_

_Aaron sat on the ground, trying to take this all in. "Whoa… I mean… me? Evil? A… a monster? I… I could never… ever do that… could I?"_

_"I understand that this must be hard to take in." Dialga said._

_"No kidding." Magnus snarked._

_Riley sat down next to Aaron, talking to him. "Aaron… whatever you want to do… it's your choice. Whether you want to help, or whether you don't, I'll support you."_

_Aaron spoke back. "Thank you, Riley. But I believe that I know what I need to do."_

_Aaron faced Dialga. "I'm going to help." he looked back toward the others. "We ALL are!"_

_"Of course we will!" Nick cheered._

_"We'll do our best!" Bridgette added._

_"Meh, at least we get to go on an adventure." Magnus shrugged._

_"Thank you." said Dialga. "Thank you so much. But I must warn you; this isn't your typical adventure. It will be harsh. It will be cruel. It will be merciless. I can't guarantee that all of you will come back alive. Are you sure you wish to do this?"_

_Aaron looked around at his companions, all of which were smiling at him… even Magnus._

_"Bring it on."_

_With those words, Dialga immediately teleported all of them away from this typical universe… and into a darker and crueler one._

* * *

Keldeo blinks and shakes his head. "Um. . .okay. . . guys. This isn't _Pokemon Mystery Dungeon,_ where all you have to lose is your money and items, this is some dead serious stuff here. I mean, this is WAR. Like the Fact Sphere says:"

_**Fact Sphere:** "The likelihood of you dying violently within the next five minutes is 87.61%."_

Keldeo shrugged, "But ya know, these guys wouldn't be heroes and this story wouldn't be an adventure if they didn't face this challenge. So off we go. . . . .Oh but wait, we have to meet Reshiram and Zekrom's son first!"

Jack groaned, "Don't tell me; it's a Reshiram/Zekrom hybrid. Right?"

* * *

_Raiden was, in many ways, a combination of both his mother and his father. Not just in appearance, but in personality as well. His overall body structure resembled his father Zekrom's, though most of his coloring was of his mother Reshiram. He had both arms and a pair of wings like Zekrom's that he could only use to hover short distances. However, his body was striped black and his wings were white. He had a turbine tail like his father, but the electric power in his tail and his glowing eyes was a purple combination of his parents' blue and red._

* * *

"Called it. Good grief, this story really knows how to push my buttons; it's thrown in almost every Pokémon pet-peeve I have! If AuraWielder invents a new move, I'm going to do something violent."

Keldeo pointed a hoof at Jack and said, "Well this isn't the Angry Jack Show."

**_Angry Joe: _**_"I'm just gonna FLIP OUT!"_

"So calm down. I actually really like Raiden. It would be cool if I could actually meet him. You gotta like a guy who respects his parents. Here comes his mom."

* * *

_"You can't push yourself too far all at once. I know you want to be strong, but you can't take this too fast. Otherwise, you'll just end up too exhausted and overloaded."_

_Raiden wanted to protest, but saw the wisdom in his mother's words. "Y-You're right, Mom. It's just that… I… I want to be strong. F-For Dad's sake."_

_Reshiram couldn't help but smile softly. She sat down on the grass of the training grounds, laying down and looking up at the skies. "Remember how we would always spend those lazy afternoons just looking up at the clouds, trying to make figures out of them?"_

_Raiden smiled. "Yeah, I remember those times. I wish things were that simple again."_

_Raiden, without the slightest bit of hesitation, lied down on Reshiram, with her always being strong enough to support the weight of her son. Raiden wasn't ever going to admit it, but he always considered himself something of a momma's boy. He had a very deep love and respect for his parents, which made Zekrom's capturing and reprogramming all the harder to deal with. Though he would put on a strong face for most of the other Legendaries, the kidnapping and reprogramming of his father emotionally broke him. Right now, he was just trying to cope._

_"…What if Dad's lost for good? W-What if we can't get him back from Cyrus' army? What if-?"_

_"Raiden." Reshiram reassured her son. "Asking 'what if' is not going to help you at all. You're only going to get worried over something that may not even happen. If Zekrom is indeed lost for good, then we will have to accept it when the time comes. But we don't know for sure yet, so worrying won't do any good. Just pray to God about it if you need to, and you can always talk to me."_

_Raiden sighed, knowing his mother was right. "You're right, Mom. It's just… I keep thinking back to that day. Maybe if I had been stronger, I could've stopped them…"_

_Flashback_

_1 month ago_

_"Agh! These guys don't give in easily, do they?! Darkrai, cover those Hydreigons for me! I need to get those Gyarados!"_

* * *

Keldeo looks excited, "Okay! Cool! No we get to see one of the battles fought by the Resistance against-"

* * *

_As Darkrai cast a Dark Void to get the Hydreigons after him to fall asleep, Raiden charged up the Electric move Fusion Bolt. As Raiden's Fusion Bolt made contact with the Gyarados, Zekrom's casted Fusion Bolt hit at the same time. The combined electricity completely fried the Gyarados, putting them down for good._

* * *

"WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?" Keldeo recoils in horror, "Holy Biscuits! It just got real!"

"I have to admit, this battle is pretty well written," Jack said, "The action is packed, the moves realistic, the sides evenly matched...

* * *

_Reshiram and Zekrom yelled in union, charging up a powerful combo of Fusion Bolt and Fusion Flare and with the attacks combined, it completely killed off Volcarona for good. Reshiram went to tend to her son's wounds, which the Greninja exploited. All throughout the battle, he had been slyly sneaking closer towards Zekrom. While the rest of the Legendaries defended themselves from the huge group of Bisharps, Greninja used the chance to knock out Zekrom with a sneak attack, as he was briefly separated from the group._

* * *

Jack reeled back for a moment, "Wait a second! Oh, sorry; my mistake. That was weird; for a second, I thought it said..."

* * *

_...Greninja used the chance to knock out Zekrom with a sneak attack..._

* * *

Jack's jaw dropped in pure astonishment, "That... How... What the biscuits?!"

Keldeo blinked in total shock as he stared at the Greninja. Keldeo sighed and he got out a sheet of paper.

"Okay then. It's time for you, Jack, to decide which Review Meme I should use here," Keldeo said in a calm elegant voice, and he started to read items off of the paper, "First we have the 'Psych Hydra' from the original 'Captain America' movie."

* * *

A man walked up to the scientist and said, "Congratulations." He went to shake the scientist's hand, but then pulled out a gun and said, "HEIL HYDRA!" **_BANG!_**

* * *

"Sinister. Next we have the 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Shark' joke from 'Sharknado'."

* * *

A shark suddenly burst out of manhole. _"WOAH! Teenage Mutant Ninja-!" **BANG! **__"OW! Jerk," _the shark said as he fell down after getting both barrels from a shotgun.

* * *

"Fantastic. And last we have 'I'm An Angry Mother Zoroark' from my review of 'Zoroark: Master of Illusions'.

* * *

Zoroark burst out of the airship and jumped in front of the full moon and roared.

_"I'M AN ANGRY MOTHER ZOROARK! Zoroark. . ."_

_**RAAARRRGH!**_

* * *

"Wonderful. Now, which meme would you like me to use, Jack?" Keldeo asked.

Jack grinned, "I have to admit, 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Frog' seems to fit the occasion."

_Ding!_

* * *

Greninja jumped out of the shadows and appeared to fly high up into the air behind Zekrom's back.

_**"WOAH!"**_

Greninja threw a powerful Water Shuriken down at Zekrom's neck.

_**"Teenage Mutant Ninja-!"**_

_CRASH!_

The sneak attack scored a critical hit on Zekrom and knocked him down to the ground hard.

"Jerk," Zekrom muttered right before blacking out.

* * *

"Okay, in all seriousness, there's something about that Greninja," Keldeo said suspiciously, "Just, looking at him, thinking about him really gets under my skin. Like, you kinda just _know_ he's up to no good."

Jack scratched his head, "You know, I can't help but wonder... No, it couldn't be."

"What is it?" Keldeo asked curiously.

"Well, I was thinking that this Greninja might be something much bigger, pretending to be a frog Pokémon."

"What, you mean he's like a Zoroark or something? We already had one Zalton reference earlier, and I can't afford to keep making them."

"I don't know; it might be something else from Kalos, but I digress. Whatever way it does it, Greninja carries Zekrom away-"

* * *

_ As soon as Reshiram and the other Legendaries noticed what Greninja did, Commander Aaron cast up an Aura Shield covering himself and the Greninja holding Zekrom. Try as they might, the Legendaries couldn't break through the Commander's Aura Shield._

_"Well, well, well…" the Commander taunted. "I may not have found your little hideout, but I still managed to claim a very nice prize."_

_Reshiram's rage flared up the most, in an indescribable fury that even intimidated the Legendaries on HER side._

_"Release him! You BASTARD!" Reshiram cursed heavily and loudly. "You heartless, soulless, good-for-nothing, monstrous BASTARD!"_

_"Aw, that's the best compliment I've received all day. Thanks honey. I'll be sure to take care very good care of your husband. He's going to be a wonderful addition to my army."_

_"NO!" she screamed again, furiously trying to shatter the Aura Shield. But the very moment she and the other Legendaries finally managed to shatter the shield…_

_…they were gone._

_"…No." Reshiram whispered to herself, tearing up._

_"No…"_

* * *

"-whoa, and Reshiram goes into a fury, but fails to stop it, and that's the end of that flashback. And then, it seems that Raiden meets up with AU-you."

* * *

_"Maybe I'll go chat with the new guy. No time like the present." Raiden thought. He made his way to Keldeo's quarters, where he saw the colt writing something in a book. Keldeo looked at Raiden in surprise, quickly tossing the pencil out of his mouth and shoving the book underneath his bed._

* * *

Keldeo clapped his hooves joyfully and said, "Aw yeah! Now we're talking! Huh, I have a diary-"

Munna flew in and shouted, "FORESHADOWING!" She then flew away again.

* * *

_"Heh heh…" Keldeo chuckled nervously. "So… hi."_

_Raiden shrugged off the odd reaction. "Hey. How you doing?"_

_"Oh… getting by. What with all of the war and everything."_

_"Yeah. Me too."_

_It was clearly an awkward first meeting. The two has seen each other before, of course. But Keldeo had arrived only a week ago, and the two had never even talked to each other prior to this moment. But both of them had a clear goal in mind. Raiden wanted to know Keldeo more, and Keldeo was willing to make a new friend. And both would appreciate the benefit of extra moral and combat support in a battlefield where it is greatly needed._

_"So what's your sob story? We all have them…" Keldeo sighed. Raiden looked over him as he said that. His heart was hardened, that was for sure. It reminded Raiden of what had happened to him only a month earlier, leaving him with a shattered heart. He acted the same way. Dark. Cold. Full of despair._

_"I lost my father a month ago." Raiden confessed. "To… Aaron."_

_Keldeo sighed, laying on his bed and facing away from Raiden. The silence as the minutes slowly passed was deafening. Raiden wondered if he said something wrong as Keldeo spoke up again._

_"You're not alone in that regard."_

_Raiden looked up at Keldeo as he continued speaking, still facing away from the larger Legendary._

_"You're not alone in losing loved ones. I've lost the only Pokémon that I called my family. And to the same bastard, too."_

_"Well, that's one thing we have in common." Raiden thought, knowing that they both shared an intense hatred for the evil Commander._

_"…Xerneas brought you in, didn't he?" Raiden mentioned, recalling Xerneas coming back with the colt when he had been brought in._

_"That's true." Keldeo answered. "He's the closest thing I have to a family now."_

_"I think we just need to all hold onto each other. We'll find a way through this. I'm sure of it."_

_Keldeo smiled, having not done so for a long time. "Yeah. I think you're right."_

_A call came from down the hallway, definitely belonging to Reshiram. "Raiden! Your lunch is ready!"_

_"Oh. Well, that would be lunch. I guess I better get going." Raiden said._

_"You didn't have lunch earlier today?" Keldeo questioned._

_"Well… yeah." Raiden muttered. "I've been training since 9 in the morning, to be honest. I just… I just want to be strong, I guess. Maybe I push myself too far sometimes, but I don't want to lose my mother to Aaron like my father."_

_"…And I don't want to lose Xerneas."_

_Raiden had an idea. "Then how about a pact? We both do our best job possible to protect the families we have left from the Commander's Army."_

_Keldeo smiled. "That's something I can agree with."_

_Raiden opened the door to leave, only to hold it open. "Come on, Keldeo. Let's chow down together."_

_Keldeo had a feeling of joy inside him, perhaps making his first friend since coming to this hell-ridden battleground. And Raiden felt closer to Keldeo as well, being the two youngest Legendary Pokémon in the Resistance._

* * *

"I really like the chemistry Raiden and I share here," Keldeo said, "with me losing the Swords of Justice and him losing Zekrom. And I'll be we'll be getting a lot out of that friendship pact!"

* * *

_"Maybe this could be the start of something"_

* * *

"And that's all there is to be seen!" Keldeo declared.

"Indeed. So; what's your verdict?" Jack asked.

"IT WAS AWESOME! THAT'S MY VERDICT!" Keldeo exclaimed, "Other than the whole ordeal over Legendary Pokemon genders, this introduction to the mythos of _'Conquering the Dark'_ was without a doubt a great one. It showed us the condition of the Bad Future and how it got that way, it introduced the new characters excellently and showed how likeable they are, it set up conflicts, backstories, and goals, and it all just comes together in an epic hype for an adventure I'm dying to see. Oh yeah, and also, XERNEAS! HE'S SO COOL!"

Jack grinned and shook his head, "Well as for me, I know I did a little bit of ranting about some things. However, a good deal of them were either just nitpicks, or personal issues. It would be unfair to judge this fanfic just by what it did wrong, so let's see what it did right; the characters were deep and felt like real people, it perfectly mixed action and other things, and it also had a great sense of balance for the right amount of detail. Overall, I really liked what I saw; this story promises to be just as good as _Breaking the Chains_, and maybe better. I look forward to seeing for myself.."

Keldeo nodded, "Yes indeed. I guess you ending up here in the Moor was a lucky event. I just wish we knew exactly how it happened."

And then Dialga appeared right behind them in a flash of light.

"Woah, it's Dialga!" Keldeo exclaimed in amazement.

"What are you doing here?" Jack asked.

Dialga laughed, and said in a distinctly masculine voice, "Well now, aren't we the fearless one; talking to the Legendary Pokémon of Time like that. However, I suppose you do have the right to be a little upset, considering that I was the one who brought you here."

"YOU brought Jack here?" Keldeo gasped at the diamond Temporal Pokemon.

"Indeed," Dialga replied.

"Why?" Jack asked, his face devoid of expression.

"I brought you here, so that you could learn what is at stake."

Jack furrowed his brow, "What do you mean?"

Dialga sighed, "N was a very smart human; his theory was absolutely correct, but a little too simple. I am Dialga from 'Conquering the Dark'."

Keldeo spat out the Berry Juice he was suddenly drinking. "What?! From the-? It's real?"

Dialga sighed, "I'm afraid so. However, it's a little more complicated than N made it out to be, and far more complicated than I can explain now. What I came to tell you, is that the choice that made that reality wasn't Aaron's; it was yours, Jack Storm."

The news hit Jack like a mountain, "What? How could I cause all that?"

"Soon after I send you back, you'll be faced by a choice; I wish I could tell you what choice, but I can't see that. However, I can see that you will have to sacrifice something, or someone, very close to you. If you make the wrong choice, then Cyrus will succeed in taking over the world."

Jack fell to his knees, like the weight of the world was on his shoulders, "Thank you for telling me."

Dialga looked at him with something akin to pity, "I wish I could say something to encourage you, but there is nothing to say. Come with me; I will take you back."

Jack stood, "Thank you. And as for you, Keldeo," he attempted a smile, "This was fun; if I'm ever in the neighborhood, can we do this again?"

Keldeo nodded, "Sure thing, Jack. I'm glad to have you as a friend. Good luck in making that choice. Just be brave."

Dialga opened a temporal portal and walked through; Jack followed, waving back at Keldeo. Then, the portal closed and they were gone.

Keldeo sighed, "Well, if the future is in the hands of someone like Jack Storm," Keldeo shrugged and smiled, "Then what the hay do we have to be worried about? Anyway, I hope you all enjoy the story of _Conquering the Dark, _as well as the tale of Jack Storm. I'm Keldeo the Critic and I review Pokemon Fan Fiction!" Keldeo turned and left.

* * *

_**Meanwhile, thousands of miles away. . .**_

* * *

A Pokemon hung upside down from a tree branch, it's eyes closed in meditation. It's tongue hung out and blew in the breeze like a scarf. However, this was no Lickitung. The Pokemon pulled itself onto the top of the branch, and then slammed it's hand down and used it's water powers to disappear in a mighty Water Pulse.

* * *

**THE END**

_Performed by Keldeo of the Swords of Justice_**  
**

_AND Jack Storm 448_

_Character of Jack Storm is from **"Rising Storm- Book 1" **by Jack Storm 448_

**Credits**

_Nostalgia Critic- Food Fight_

___Nostalgia Critic- The Avengers_

_____Nostalgia Critic- Captain America_

_______Nostalgia Critic- Sharknado_

_________Nostalgia Critic- Jurassic Park_

_Nostalgia__________ Critic- Ghost Rider_

_________My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic_

_________The Legend of Spyro Trilogy_

_________Krypto the Superdog_

_________Friendship is Witchraft_ by Sherclop Pones_______  
_

_________Portal 2_ by Valve

_Sonic Riders _by SEGA

_Mighty Morphin Power Rangers_

_Button's Adventures _by Jan Animations/Ask the Crusaders

_Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Time/Darkness/Sky_

_Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Gates To __Infinity_

_________Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged_ by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW

_The Angry Joe Show_

_Arceus the Critic _by Imperator Justinian

_The Angry Bug Show _by DragoNiro

_Kyurem (and Cryogonal) the Critic by Mr. Grool_

_Super Smash Bros. Wii U_

_Pokemon X and Y_

**_Theme Song__ Inspired by "Nostalgia Critic Theme Song w/ Lyrics"_ by ShadowCloudVA**

**Special Thanks**

_BrickBoy1894/BrickBrony1894_

_Confused Matthew_

_That Guy With The Glasses_

_Bulbapedia_

* * *

_". . .Gave them a really good old fashioned butt-kicking."_

* * *

Hi, Keldeo here. Just a quick little note at the end here. First, I want to thank Jack Storm 448 one more time for collabing with me, this was a lot of fun. Second, I want to give ShadowCloudVA the credit for inspiring my new theme song lyrics with the lyrics he wrote for the Nostalgia Critic. And third, some of you diehard fans are probably wondering how all this will factor into "Keldeo the Critic- THE MOVIE" that I made a trailer for back at the end of Season One. Well, much like how _Journey of the Spark _got a total rewrite, so will my movie, and trust me, this is a GOOD THING. It'll still have all the same characters, plus a few extra ones, and another cameo or two. I haven't told _ANYONE _about the plot or cast, but with a little luck, some of you might end up getting a PM from me asking you to type out a few lines for your character in this movie. . .which will probably end up coming out in 2016. Anyway, thanks for all your support and reviews, and have a great day!


	4. A Guardian's Princess- Part One

Keldeo walked silently through the Moor of Icirrus. The moon shone down on the lone pony as he walked, alone with his thoughts. He jumped up a few rocky ledges and seated himself on the edge of a cliff overlooking the Moor.

"What's up?" a voice said.

Keldeo turned to as Meloetta appeared next to him.

The Colt Pokemon sighed and spoke from his heart, "I can't review this Fan Fic."

Meloetta blinked, "Is it that bad?"

"No, no, no. It's nothing like that," Keldeo said, "I didn't like it, but it wasn't unreadable. It wasn't like _Too Much H2O _or anything."

"Well then, what's the problem?" Meloetta asked.

Keldeo didn't answer right away. He stared at the moon in thought for a time before answering. "I . . .don't have many good things to say about this FanFic. It's mostly all bad. I _really _didn't like it. But I _know _that others do. What's gonna happen when they see this review? Will they get mad at me? Will they. . .hate me?"

Meloetta kissed Keldeo on the cheek.

"Don't say that, Kelde," she said with a smile, "They're all smart enough to know that it's just your opinion. Sure, it's easy to be frustrated with a Critic. A Critic often goes after all the flaws and pierces sharp and deep with the sword of criticism. Negativity is often a Critic's theme when reviewing something he doesn't like. But at the end of the day, whatever a Critic says is just his opinion, and people eventually realize that and go on to make their own opinions while looking at it from the Critic's angle for some added insight. As long as you don't claim that you're right and everyone else is wrong, you don't have to worry about anything."

Keldeo smiled, still with a blush on his face. "You really think so?"

Meloetta nodded, "I know so. So show me that Sword of Justice bravery, and don't be afraid to speak your mind about something. No one should be afraid to voice your opinion, including you. So get out there and review this Fan Fic."

"Meloetta. . ." Keldeo said as he touched his hoof to the Mystic Water hanging around his neck. Ever since he got it from Meloetta at Christmas, he has never taken it off. "Thanks to you. . .I know what to do. . ." Keldeo stood tall and looked out over the Moor. "It's divisiveness time!"

. . .

. . .

. . .

"Oh, um, Meloetta?"

"Yes, Kelde?"

"I'm gonna need your help with something. . ."

* * *

**_BOOOOOM!_**

A black wall was blown apart by Keldeo's Focus Blast.

_**Keldeo the Critic!**_

Keldeo activated his Secret Sword and swung it, causing the screen to burst.

Keldeo sprayed water from his hooves, using Hydro Pump to send Nature's Child Rosella blasting off.

Keldeo and Santa Paws screamed in horror as huge burst of dark purple energy erupted in front of them.

Ghost Pony Rider roared.

_**He reviews those Pokemon FanFics!**_

Kyurem and Cryogonal the Critics both screamed as a zombie Lucario with a chainsaw appeared on their TV.

Keldeo screamed in horror, but slapped himself to snap out of it.

Justinian was seated behind a desk in his study, with Keldeo standing on the other side.

_**Keldeo the Critic!**_

Mewtwo punched Mewtwo Girl in the face.

"FORESHADOWING!" Munna exclaimed.

"NO SHIP, SHERCLOCK!" the Intoxiquer shouted.

"Eww," Meloetta said.

"AHH!" Keldeo jumped back in shock as Rosella was now floating there.

_**So much to see and do!**_

Matthais Unidostres and BrickBrony1894 bro-hoofed.

_**For the FanFics he reviews!**_

Meloetta danced around and sang while dressed as Elsa from _Frozen_.

Sherclop Pones laughed demonically as his eyes glowed a demonic red.

Keldeo and Ryan the Lucario fought on a cliff top, Secret Sword and Bone Rush clashing over and over.

**_He's a Sword of Justice!_**

Button Mash and Sweetie Belle bonked heads as they tried playing _Wonderbolt Free Fliers._

Keldeo burst out of the ice encasing him in an explosion of light.

_**Keldeo the Critic!**_

Keldeo reared up on his hind legs, his expression serious and his Secret Sword raised and glowing brightly.

**Keldeo the Critic- Season Three**

******"A Guardian's Princess" by ThatOneDwarf**

Zorua slowly walked out in front of the stage. A small splattering of applause sounded as he got to the center of the stage. While standing in front of the red curtains, the Zorua raised his two front paws and began to conduct music. The curtains opened as the show began.

**_Moor of Icirrus, 2014_**

Terrakion appeared on the screen, standing still and serious. He raised his head and began to sing along with the orchestrated music.

_There was a 'Mon_

_That Keldeo the Critic 'Mon_

_He once attempted to __review_

_"A Guardian's. . ._

_. . .Princess" by That Dwarf_

_He hated it_

_Berated it_

_For causing so much misery. . ._

Keldeo sat alone in a cave hidden by a waterfall. The only sound was the sound of the rushing water of the falls covering the entrance, sealing him off from the outside world and leaving him alone with his thoughts.

_"'A Guardian's Princess. A FanFic. A story called the 'Breaking Bad' of AdvanceShipping FanFictions. Written by ThatOneDwarf. A Fic of pretentious pleasures. Where fairy tale junkies and renaissance faire fans praise this uninspired RPG for its originality. How could they not see that this film has ripped off every tired romance, every overused cliche, every knights and princesses trope to make people believe that it's saying more than it really is? But perhaps I'm getting ahead of myself. . .I first read this FanFic exactly two weeks ago..."_

* * *

Keldeo is smiling brightly outside in the sun.

"It's me! Keldeo the Critic! I review Pokemon Fanfiction when I'm not training with the other Swords of Justice!"

Keldeo frowned, "What is with people turning stuff into fairy tales?"

* * *

_"The Midnight Dragon" by Toadettegirl2012_

* * *

Keldeo waved his hoof, "No, no, no; _that_ story created a fairy tale legend and tied it into the Anime. That was a _good_ FanFic! What I mean is when a writer takes characters and throws them into a fairy tale setting and makes it so they were always in that world and their cannon lives never happened. I mean, what, are the characters not good enough the way they are? You need to turn them into knights and princes and princesses? _Littlest Pet Shop_ has it. _Beyblade _has it. And now Pokemon has it. This is _"A Guardian's Princess"_

* * *

_**A Guardians Princess**_

_By: ThatOneDwarf _

_The Princess of the Hoenn Region finds her Knight in Shining Armour, but fate separates the two with an agreement made between her father and the King of Johto long before she was born. The two will need to fight and risk their lives for one another in more ways then one, which could end in war if they defy the King. AdvancedShipping_

* * *

"I don't normally like fairy tales. . .unless Disney is writing them. And let me be honest with my opinion here. Not only is this FanFic not Disney, it also has a wonky plot, terrible characterization, and connects to its source material as well as _The Super Mario Bros Movie_. I mean, it's _bad_. This Fic is really, _really bad._"

"So get ready to see something worse than _Tangled!_ This is _'A Guardian's Princess'!_" Keldeo announced bitterly as he bucked at the ground angrily.

"We start in Hoenn Castle where we find out that May is the Princess, and she has to go meet Drew, the Prince of Johto. And she is not happy!"

* * *

_Her eyes widened and a look of despair came across her face. "Is it to go see that arrogant son o-"_

_"My lady! Watch your tongue, you are part of the Royal Family and are not to speak such language!" Johanna scolded seriously._

* * *

"So May is goes on the journey with an escort, but bandits show up, kill the guards, and take her hostage!"

Keldeo blinked in shock, "Wow, that escalated quickly! This is the part where Mario jumps in and saves her, right?"

_**Portal 2 Announcer:** "Sarcasm Sphere Self-test Complete."_

* * *

_"Shh, don't make a sound. I'm getting you out of here…" A male voice whispered into her ear. She was about to look back to see who her supposed rescuer, but stopped when the hand left her mouth and she felt pressure against the ropes that held her wrist._

_"Don't make a sound, and don't try to run off or they'll hear you!" He whispered as he cut through the rope and removed them from her arms._

_May took in his appearance before answering, the man, or surprisingly young man who appeared to be her age wore a dark blue fedora-esk hat that spiked off in the back with a blue band around it, a blue tunic was worn over a light grey long-sleeved shirt that had its ends tucked into blue gloves that had yellow striped running from the cuff up to a light blue circle on the back of the hands. His grey trousers matched his shirt and were also tucked into matching blue boots._

* * *

Keldeo frowned, "That's not Mario."

* * *

_May looked ahead and saw a slight glow further ahead, she was about to question what it was, but was interrupted by a low pitched whistle by her blue hatted hero._

_The glow started to grow bigger with each step as they drew closer to the object. Within a few seconds they appeared in a very small clearing and in front of a small white pony that had flames for a mane._

_"A Ponyta?" May questioned curiously._

* * *

"Oh, so it's _Link_! Of course!" Keldeo said with a smile.

* * *

_"W-What's your name?" May asked curiously, there was a long ride ahead of them and she wanted to know what her rescuers name was so she could thank him._

_He didn't answer immediately, but after the pause he did, "Call me… Strider."_

_May furrowed her eyebrows at the name, "That can't be your real name now right?"_

_"No it's not my real name, but call me that for now, you can know my real name once we get you to safety."_

* * *

Keldeo gained a deadpan expression, "Oh gee. I wonder who this guy is?"

_Ding!_

_AdvancedShipping!_

* * *

_"How do you know that they found that I was gone?"_

_Strider slowed Blaze to a canter as they neared the edge of the forest and entered the windswept plains in front of them, "I could see them." He stated flatly._

_"How could you possibly see them?" May asked confused, and disbelievingly calling his bluff._

_"Aura."_

_"Aura?" May questioned._

_"Yes Aura."_

_"To use Aura you have to be-" She stopped as she realized what she was saying. Turning back to see Strider, she looked into his eyes, "Are… Are you a Guardian?" She asked in disbelief._

_"Not quite my Lady, I'm still an apprentice." He replied._

* * *

"Oh gee. He has Aura Powers. I wonder who this guy is?" Keldeo said in the same deadpanned tone.

_Ding!_

_'Pokemon Ranger and the Kidnapped Riolu!'_

"So 'Strider' saves May and brings her to safety."

* * *

"_My name is Ash,"_

_"Ash?"_

_"Yes Ash."_

_May nodded as she thought over his name, "Ash?" she asked._

_"Yes?"_

_"What's your last name?"_

_"Ketchum,"_

_"Ash Ketchum?"_

_A grin had begun to form on Ash's face as the three word conversation progressed, "Yes, my name is Ash Ketchum."_

* * *

Keldeo face hoofed, "Oh come on! What's the point of hiding his name if you were going to reveal it so quickly? It's so pointless that I can't even think of a joke to make about that! Anyway, Ash takes May back to her castle, but then they are ambushed by the bandits. So Ash has his Rapidash use it's Fire-type attacks to-"

* * *

_Ash leapt off of Blaze and rolled to break his fall, he heard the Princess shout something, but ignored it for the time being. Twirling the sword once in his hand, he took a look at his attackers. There were two men lying unmoving at odd angles underneath of the fallen Rapidash, which had snapped its neck during the fall._

_But there were still four armed men, all but one armed with a short sword, while the odd man out was equipped with a crossbow._

_"Get em' boys!" The crossbowman shouted aiming towards Ash. The three swordsmen ran towards Ash who was ready on the balls of his feet. The first swordsmen swung an overhand cut which Ash parried easily, before turning to block a side stroke being swung by another._

_Blocking another side cut, Ash lunged forward and took a bandit in the abdomen causing him to crumple to the ground in a heap. Spinning back to face the remaining swordsmen, he ducked just before a quiet twang sound cut through the air._

_The crossbow bolt flew over Ashs head and into another swordsman. Using this time to his advantage he parried a side cut, followed by delivering his own sideways cut to the final swordsmen head, but in the final split second before contact he twisted his wrist and hit him with the flat of the blade in the temple, knocking him unconscious._

* * *

Keldeo threw up his forehooves, "Okay! This is a_ Legend of Zelda_ Crossover! This is not Ash, this is _Link_! And what's the point of having a Pokemon if you don't use it to fight! What, was he just trying to look cool in front of the Princess? Come on!"

"So Ash manages to capture one of the bandits and they arrive back at May's castle and go before the King and Ash's Aura mentor, Alyssa Cloud."

* * *

_"You have my sincere gratitude for protecting my daughter; she means the absolute world to me… If anything ever happened to her I don't know what I would do, there must be some reward for your actions" He thanked as he walked over to the apprentice Guardian and held out his hand._

_Ash took the offered hand and shook firmly, "There are no thanks needed your Majesty, I'd be more than willing to do it again if the occasion ever arose. Just knowing your daughter is safe is more than enough of a reward for me," Ash answered truthfully._

_The King smiled and clapped Ash firmly on the shoulder, "You have a fantastic apprentice here Alyssa, one of the noblest young men I've met,"_

_Alyssa stepped forward and nodded approvingly, "He certainly is, we think he'll go far as a Guardian," Ashs mentor praised subtly._

_Ash smiled and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, "There is one matter left and that involves the prisoner," He began getting back to the topic at hand._

_Norman nodded seriously turning to the frightened bandit, "Tell me Sir Ash, you've done an excellent job so far, what do you suggest we do with him?"_

_Ash raised an eyebrow at the king's question, not suspecting this at all but answered, "In my opinion, my Lord, is that you take him into questioning. He had been no trouble at all during transportation, and may hold valuable information about the ambush."_

* * *

Keldeo sighed, "I'm sorry, but I refuse to believe that this guy is Ash. You could call this guy _anything_ and it wouldn't matter. He's just a bland Gary Stu who acts like he should be wielding the Triforce of Courage and the Master Sword. Ash never was a perfect person, and he never fought anything. . .accept for that time he kicked Hunter J's Drapion. Look, Ash is brave and good, sure, but he also has a bit of awkwardness, charm, passion, niavety, and insecurities; kinda like me! Ash and I are a lot alike. But this guy is a smooth casanova who does everything perfectly. Do you really think Ash could fight off a bunch of bandits with nothing but a sword and his bare hands? Uh. . .no. . ."

"So, then we get a plot thread about Pikachu being sick."

Munna flew in and shouted, "FORESHADOWING!"

"Then May kisses Ash on the cheek and they fall asleep dreaming about each other. The next morning, May and her maid Dawn talk about how hot Ash is. . .ugh. . .next scene."

* * *

_Both girls' heads snapped forward when a bright neon white flash lit up the forest a few yards away, followed by a scream._

_May gasped, she knew the sound of that voice. "ASH!" She yelled as she drove her heels into her Rapidash's side and took off at a gallop towards the scream._

_"May wait!" Dawn yelled after her, but it was to no avail. May bounded around a corner, and the small cabin came into view. But she didn't stop; she rode around the back of the small home and looked around frantically for some sign of the Aura Guardian._

_She felt her heart leap into her throat as she saw him lying motionless on the grass some fifty meters away. She leapt down from the saddle and sprinted over to the prone figure; she fell to her knees and gently touched the slightly charred face of the Guardian._

_But as soon as her hand made contact with his skin, she jerked it away as a light shock zapped her. "Ash?" She whispered worriedly._

_"You missed!" Ash called out as he sat up and cracked his back, seemingly unaware of the Princess beside him._

_"Ash you're alright!" May exclaimed as she took the Guardian into a tight hug. Confused, Ash turned his head and saw the Princess._

_"May?" He asked curiously._

_May let him go with a light pink gracing her cheeks at how close their faces were, "What happened, you screamed and there was a flash!" She exclaimed worriedly._

_A grin tugged at the corner of his mouth, "He" He pointed over towards a tall pine tree thirty meters away, "Missed."_

_The Princess looked over to the tree right as a small yellow figure leapt off a branch three meters high and onto the ground, "Chuka pi chu Pikapi chukka!" The small yellow creature exclaimed as he marched over to the two sitting on the ground._

_"You did to, your timing was off and your still not a hundred percent. Just except it, you know it's true," Ash stated bluntly._

_The small mouse shook its head, "Chu Pikapi, Pikachu pika pika!" It then turned to the Princess and cocked its head sideways, "Chuka?"_

_Ash took the little mouse into his arms and held him in front of May, "May I'd like you to meet Pikachu, Pikachu I'd like to introduce you to the Princess May Maple."_

_May stared at Pikachu and Pikachu stared back. Both seemed to be assessing each other. Pikachu turned to Ash and smirked, "Chu Pichu cha pikachu…"_

_"No she really is the Princess, right May?"_

* * *

"Wait. . .can Ash understand Pikachu? And I thought Pikachu was sick!"

* * *

_May stopped staring at the little mouse and turned to Ash, "Yeah I'm the Princess… But what is… Pikachu?" She asked curiously and somewhat nervously._

* * *

"You don't know what a Pikachu is?"

* * *

_He looked over to the yellow mouse and sighed._

_"I didn't know what Pikachu was at first so I called Alyssa over. She said he was a semi-rare species, she told me that legends said that the small creatures could harness the power of lightning,"_

* * *

"Oh, okay, so this world is just different." Keldeo shrugged, "Well, anyway, a while back, Ash met Pikachu when he saw him with an arrow lodged in his body. Now, why anyone would go around firing arrows into Pikachus, I don't Shake'n Bakin' know. Anyway, Pikachu was about to die, so Ash pumped his Aura and life energy into Pikachu to save him. But this nearly caused _Ash_ to die, so Alyssa had to jump in and save him."

Keldeo shrugged, "Well, I guess it's at least just as good as using his body to protect Pikachu from a flock of angry Spearrows."

* * *

_"So what are you two doing today?" He asked changing topics._

_May and Dawn looked from one another and shrugged, "Well nothing really, I'm going over to the battle school later. Other than that spending time with May,"_

_Ashs curiosity was aroused at that, "Why are you going to the Battle school, are you delivering a message or something?"_

_Dawn blushed and looked down, "Oh no, just going to see someone…"_

_May smirked, "She's got a crush on one-"_

_"MAY!" Dawn shrieked incredulously, she turned quickly to Ash, "I-I don't have a crush on anyone she-"_

_"Yeah you do, you visit him practically everyday!" She retaliated._

_Dawn was as red as a tomato berry as she stuttered for an answer, "Well I we, just you know talk!"_

_"Well you talk and he listens,"_

_"Who is he?" Ash asked tilting his head to the side._

_"No one!"_

_"A guy named Paul, purple hair, quiet, never smiles,"_

_Ash turned to Dawn with half astonishment, half amused smile on his face, "You like Paul Stone?" He asked disbelievingly._

* * *

Keldeo's eyes widened and leaned in close. "_PAUL!"_

_A dramatic sting played and PSA music played._

_"Yes, Paul," an announcer said, "Paul would eviscerate an Eevee if he-"_

* * *

_"No I-You know him?" Dawn asked seemingly forgetting her previous embarrassment._

_Ash nodded, "Yeah, he's a good friend of mine. We train together, and on occasion he'll come on a mission or two with me. _

* * *

A record scratch interrupted the music.

"WHAT?! Paul isn't a heartless jerk in this?! Paul and Ash are friends?!" Keldeo exclaimed.

Keldeo calmed himself and gathered his thoughts, "Okay, okay, let me get this straight. May is a Princess, Dawn is a maid, Drew is an evil Prince, Ash is a perfect Gary Stu Aura Guardian, Pikachu got body shot by a mad archer, _a__nd Paul is a nice guy? _Does anything in this story make sense!? Everything is totally upside down! Is this the Bizzaro World or something!? Okay then! Fine! While we're at it, why don't throw in some more confusing plot points! Oh yes, um, Misty is a bartender, Hunter J is a loving Kindergarten teacher, the Team Rocket Trio are the King's Elite Guard, Buneary has a crush on Oshawott, and the Bittercold is Santa Claus! GENIUS!"

* * *

_Mays head shot up as an Idea appeared, "Come have dinner with us!" She exclaimed!_

_Both Ash and Dawn had the same puzzled expression, "Huh?" They said simultaneously._

_May grinned, "Yeah, you said while we were coming back that you'd only eaten homemade meals and at the inn so how about come for dinner with us!"_

_"But isn't it a little bit short notice? And doesn't this need to be cleared with your father first?" Ash asked unsurely._

_She shook her head, "He'll be fine with it, so do you wanna come?" She asked excitedly._

_Ash nodded, "Sure, I don't see why not. When should I arrive?"_

_"Sometime around seven?"_

_Ash smiled, "Alright sounds good,"_

_Suddenly May stood up grinning and grabbed Dawn by the wrist, "Great, we got to get going but we'll see you tonight!" She announced as she and her maid rushed out the door and out of sight. Ash was about to comment on the quick departure when the door opened and the Princess stuck her head back in, "Bye!" With that she disappeared from sight._

_Ash and Pikachu stared at the door in pure confusion, "What… What just happened buddy?" Ash asked clearly perplexed._

_"Pi…Ka?" Pikachu shrugged unknowingly._

_Ash stared at the door an extra moment, "Huh." With that he stood up and went to get another cup of coffee._

* * *

Keldeo nodded, "Okay, _now _you're starting to write Ash more Ash-like. Keep it up."

"So Ash goes into the _Red Tailow Inn _and heads to the bar tended by Misty- THAT WAS A JOKE! THAT WAS A JOKE! I WAS JOKING! _**BISCUITS!" **_Keldeo shouted at the top of his lungs as he thrashed around in rage.

Keldeo calms himself down and let out a deep breath. "Whew! Okay. . .well, as this story reminds me of the cantina scene from the _Stars Wars Holiday Special, _Ash tells Misty about his recent _Legend of Zelda _LARPing session and his feelings for Princess May."

* * *

_"Well May… The day after I got May out of the bandit's camp, we were on the road to the castle when the bandits came and tried to get her back. Long story short, I stopped them and took one as hostage." Misty nodded and gestured for him to continue, "Well she was in shock from what happened, fighting as you know isn't the prettiest things, so I held her to help her calm down and…" He trailed of as he repositioned himself to be more comfortable._

_"And?" Misty asked curiously._

_"And well… I felt weird I suppose."_

_"Define weird for me please,"_

_"Well it was a weird feeling in my chest; I didn't want to let her go because if I did I was afraid that something would happen to her. And I didn't want that."_

_She wasn't sure, but Misty was beginning to piece together what was going through Ashs mind. "Ash, what do you think of the Princess?" She asked plainly._

_He shrugged, "I dunno, she's nice?" He answered briefly._

_Misty shook her head, "Oh come on what do you really think of her, no need to feel embarrassed or anything."_

_He sighed, "Well she's nice, a good sense of humor, she's pretty, warm, and… And yeah." He replied honestly. He looked up from the counter and saw the red head with a smirk on her face, "What?"_

_"You think she's pretty?" She asked bluntly._

_He felt blood rush to his cheeks as they turned a light red, "Well, uh yeah?"_

_"And what do you mean by 'She's warm'?"_

_"When we were riding back I had to keep an arm around her and… She was warm, and then when she sewed up where the crossbow bolt went into my shoulder, her hands were soft and warm…" His cheeks were red in embarrassment as he said that._

_"Is that all?" Misty asked seriously. She knew what was wrong with him, but she wasn't going to let this opportunity slip by to tease him a bit._

_He shook his head, "There is one thing that happened," His cheeks turned a darker shade of red just at the thought of it._

_"And that is?" She inquired._

_"Well last night when Alyssa and I left the castle, May came down and… kissedmeonthecheek," He mumbled the last part quickly hoping that the heat he could feel in his cheeks would fade away._

_"Aww," Misty cooed teasingly, "My little Ashy has been smitten by the Princess, how adorable!"_

_Ash gaped and went wide eyed, "Mi-Misty! How- how why would you say that!" He asked incredulously!_

* * *

"You know, I like how Ash is being written now. He seems a lot more like Ash now," Keldeo said thoughtfully.

"Meanwhile, Dawn and May do the whole '_I don't have a crush on him, yes you do, do not, do to'_ skit. It's really boring. Then Max tries to kill Ash-_WHAT THE HAY?!"_

* * *

_What they saw stopped them in their tracks. Max had his sword drawn and was on the offensive as Ash parried, deflected and blocked each of his stokes, while her dad watched with interest from the side._

_"Ash, Max what are you doing!" May cried out in shock._

_Max swung an overhead cut at Ash who sidestepped the stroke, and then swung a downward cut at the sword pushing it firmly to the ground, followed by his boot on the point to keep both swords pinned to the ground. Max panted and looked away from his sword to Ashs eyes, which instantly told him the sparring was over._

* * *

Keldeo blinked, and the smiled sheepishly, "Oh, okay, they were just sparring. Sorry about that. And yes, I know that the Swords of Justice and I sparr all the time, but Secret Sword and Sacred Sword are Pokemon moves. They can't kill unless you try real hard. But swords against ordinary humans are very deadly very easily."

"So the dinner begins, and what do you know! Ash becomes even _more_ Ash-like!" Keldeo said happily.

* * *

_Ash turned to May to pose a question, but stopped with interest as he saw her shovelling food into her mouth aggressively._

_She stopped as she felt his eyes on her. Turning her head she flushed in embarrassment at the amused grin on his face, "I see that it's true about your appetite,"_

_The princess swallowed and chuckled nervously, "Yeah, I can't really help it sorry."_

_She noticed a certain sparkle in his eye as an idea seemed to come to him, "May, would you care to make a bet?" He asked bluntly._

_May wasn't an idiot, she knew where this was going, "And what would that be?"_

_"I bet I can eat more then you," He stated simply._

_May snorted in amusement at the challenge, "No offense Ash, but you've only finished a quarter of your meal. There's no way-" She stopped as he started laughing quietly._

_"Yes, but I'm in the presence of the King and Queen though." He turned to the King and Queen, "Your Majesties, would it be alright if I… Put aside my table manners for a moment?" He asked with a toothy grin on his face._

_Norman looked at Caroline with an amused smirk on his face, "What do you say dear, do you think the boy has what it takes to out eat May?"_

_Caroline looked Ash up and down, "I'm not sure, he could try but… I have yet to see someone out eat her so."_

_"If May accepts your… Challenge then it's fine with us,"_

_"So May, are you up for it?"_

_Dawn suppressed a giggle as she watched May watch Ash. Out of everything that would come out of this dinner, the handsome young Guardian had issued an eating challenge to her._

_"I-I don't know, I mean you've barely eaten as is and to catch up so we-"_

_"Is that a yes?" He asked excitedly._

_"Only if you're sure, I don't think you know what you're getting yourself into…"_

_"Hang on a moment," Ash began loading his plate with a large assortment of meats, breads, fruits, and a bunch of miscellaneous items, "Are you ready?"_

_May sighed but nodded in acknowledgment; she couldn't help but wonder why he had issued an eating challenge. Was it to embarrass her, or was he actually serious? Taking the thought away she resumed eating her dinner in the same manner as before._

_After about ten seconds, she glanced to her left and choked on a piece of meat as she saw Ash already three quarters done his mountain of food. He caught her glance and smirked, "Didn't expect this did ya?" With that he began consuming once again._

_She realised this was a genuine challenge, and there was no way she was going down without a fight. The next five minutes were silent as Norman, Caroline, Max, and Dawn watched in horrified fascination as the table was cleared of food._

_Never had they seen someone who could match, let alone pull ahead of their daughter while eating. The kitchen staff had even come out to watch the two battle head to head. Eventually the time came when a fork hit a cleaned plate and a groan escaped._

_The Princess slumped back in defeat, Ash had beat her. How in Mews name did that happen? And not only that, she'd regret these thoughts later, but she was a little turned on by Ash as he ate._

_"That. Was. AMAZING!" Max exclaimed in utter disbelief, "Ash how… How!" That's all he could say, how could anybody possibly eat so much yet not pass out._

* * *

"There! Now _that's_ the Ash I know!" Keldeo cheered, "So some time passes with Ash and May getting closer and closer, and just when you start to wish that there was an actual conflict again, it gives you one!"

* * *

_"Ash!" A voice called from across the courtyard. Ash turned his gaze to the right and saw Alyssa seated on top of Flare gesturing for him to come over._

_"Hang on a second," Ash got up and jogged over to his teacher looking up to meet her gaze, he had to shield his eyes from the sun, "Something wrong?"_

_"We have just been assigned to investigate a series of murders over in Rustboro,"_

_His face scrunched up in confusion, "What about Drake? Shouldn't he be the one to investigate this?" Drake was the Aura Guardian of the Rustboro Province and its neighbouring villages._

_Ash noticed immediately the flash of sadness in her blue eyes, "Drakes dead,"_

* * *

**_BAM-BAM-BAAAAAAAAAAAMMM!_**

_The Dramatic Deerling turned around dramatically._

* * *

_Ash stepped back in shock; it was rare for a Guardian to be killed. They were the heroes of Hoenn, and every villager looked up to them during the time of war. They were the Guardians of the Kingdom._

_"Was he murdered?" He breathed in disbelief._

_She shook her head, "No, he and Lance had gone on some assignment that was more than they bargained for,"_

_"Two Guardians? What about Lance?"_

_"He was injured; he'll be out of action for weeks. His back and legs were torn up by whatever they went after…"_

_"My Arceus…" He ran a hand through his hair, "Did they even manage to stop whatever they were after?"_

_Alyssa shook her head, "We can talk about this on our way, but right now you need to get yourself back to the cabin. I've already packed for you, so you just need to pick up your gear."_

* * *

Keldeo looked excited, "Alright! Time for some action! Let's see Ash fight this new villain!"

* * *

_A few hours passed, and eventually it was time. Drew LaRousse had officially arrived at the castle, and she along with Dawn were on their way to greet him._

_"Kill me," May whispered quickly as they took their time going down the staircase._

_"Just power through this, say hi, show him to his room and then tell him when dinner is so we can leave." Dawn stated seriously._

* * *

Keldeo's face fell, "No. No. We don't want to see this! We want some action here!"

"Okay, fine, we get to meet the evil Prince Drew. Now what is he gonna say?"

* * *

_"You're more, developed then before," He stated in a matter of factly tone. Mays eyes turned into saucers unbelieving that he had actually just said that._

_"Excuse me!" She asked incredulously just to make sure she had heard properly._

_"Well it's true Maybelle, you've grown up and so has your-" He didn't get any further as a smack sounded throughout the castle as Mays hand made contact with his cheek._

_"You sick pervert!" She yelled furiously, "Your bloody room is down the hall and second on the left!" _

* * *

_Daredevil Dan: "Are those melons real?"_

"So we leave the girls and we get to see what Ash and Alyssa are doing, but its constantly interrupted by a sword fight between Paul and Drew."

* * *

_"Why am I doing this troublesome?" He asked dully._

_A smirk found its way onto Dawns lips, "Because, if you win you can take me to the festival!" May gasped silently to herself, she didn't expect Dawn to be so forward like that._

_"And if I lose?" he scoffed._

_"I get to take you to the festival!" She answered smartly, _

* * *

Keldeo blinked. "What? That makes no sense. That's heads I win, tails you loose. Either way, they're going together. Did Dawn trick Paul? Oh great, now Paul's an idiot! And another thing, Paul's catchphrase seems to be 'troublesome' in this story."

* * *

_"Why am I doing this troublesome?" He asked dully._

* * *

_The purple headed warrior looked at her blankly, before walking off towards the center muttering something about her being troublesome under his breath._

* * *

_Picking himself up off the ground, he shrugged his shoulders, "Troublesome," He stated in greeting at her concern_

* * *

_He blinked twice as he remembered the deal, he sighed, "We'll see Troublesome," With that he stalked off to change from his training attire into clean clothing._

* * *

"I don't get it! When has Paul ever said troublesome in the Anime? And you know what's worse? After this chapter, _we never see Paul again. _Or at least he doesn't add anything important to the plot after this. You could remove Paul from the story and _nothing _would change."

"Meanwhile, Ash and Alyssa have tracked down the villains' campsite."

* * *

_Ash met her eye and then slowly nodded before turning back to the encampment. Five tents were arranged in a semi-circle around a blazing bonfire. Three Magikarp carcasses were slowly rotating on a spit above the roaring flames, where eleven men –some armed, others not- sat talking quietly to each other._

_"Fourth from the left, that's our man," Ash muttered to Alyssa, she nodded in response. "It will take us from at least now until dusk to get back to Blaze and Flare. Even longer if we keep the others alive…"_

_Alyssa remained silent judging how her apprentice decided to handle this. "Pikachu can stun and then I can get in and out with our guy, but then we'd have to deal with the others anyways. So either way. These men are going to die." Ash turned his gaze to his teacher, "You take the six on the right, and I've got the four and our target on the left."_

_She nodded in silent agreement. In unison, both apprentice and teacher silently stood up in the shadows bow at the ready. Without losing sync, they reached back into their quivers, removed, knocked, and drew back an arrow to full draw._

_"On my mark," His voice was just audible as he took in a deep breath, hearing nothing but the steady drumming of his heart._

_He released the breath smoothly across his lips._

_"Fire."_

* * *

_"Cliff Hanger! Hanging from a cliff! And that's why he's called Cliff Hanger!"_

"So, the Festival has arrived, but Ash hasn't returned yet. But, hey! At least we get some world building!"

* * *

_The Second Age War. Her eye brows furrowed in thought. The Second Age War had been the most recent war involving Kanto and Hoenn, just about nineteen years ago. The war had been her father's first real test as King. Kanto had crowned a new king for the first time in forty years, and had given the crown to a dictator._

_The new king had secretly readied his armies to launch an assault to conquer Hoenn and expand Kanto. The attack had been launched, taking out small villages at first before her father began to fight back, summoning his armies for war._

_The war raged on for months, until Hoenn called to Johto for aid to push back the Kantian Forces. Her father had fought alongside Alexander in the front lines with the Aura Guardians as they repelled the Kanto Forces until they reached Kantos own capital, Viridian._

_Reaching the capital, her father and Johto's King had captured the city along with the corrupt Royal Family of Kanto, the King, Queen, and son. The very day they were captured, all three had been executed to end the war once and for all._

_The new King of Kanto was the brother of the previous King to continue the bloodline. The war came to a close with Kanto in need of repair of their government, and an agreement made between the two Kings of Hoenn and Johto. One that remained till that very day._

* * *

Keldeo shrugged, "That's cool, I guess. So it looks like May is going to have to dance with Drew after all when suddenly. . ." Keldeo frowned, "Come on, you know what happens. You have to know. This doesn't even count as a legitimate twist."

* * *

_"My Lady," May spun around as she felt someone tap her on the shoulder. Her breath caught in her throat as she came face to face with the raven haired Guardian, "May I have this dance?" He asked sweeping his arm out to the crowd of dancers._

_It took her a moment to come to terms that he was there, standing right in front of her. He looked tired, his uniform was wrinkled and dirty, his chest heaved in and out as if he had just gone for a run, but his eyes and smile were dazzling. The smile warmed her heart, and his eyes… Instead of the auburn she knew so well, they were a deep blue that carried to many emotions too count._

_"I'd love to," She answered leaving a stunned Drew as she took his hand, him leading her to the dance floor. The pair weaved their way through the crowed until they found a relatively spacious area to dance, "I can't believe you're here," She grinned ecstatically as she wrapped her arms around his neck, and his arms found their way around her waist._

_"I skipped sleeping, and breaking for breakfast and dinner. I only stopped to give Blaze a rest every so often…" He paused before adding, "You look beautiful May,"_

_The princess blushed a deep shade of crimson at the compliment. She wore a form fitting white dress embroidered with silver linings descending from her neckline to the bottom of the dress in flourished curves._

_"Thank you," She replied softly meeting his eyes, not caring if he saw the redness of her cheeks, "Your eyes are blue,"_

_He nodded in understanding, "It's a side effect of using Aura for too long, I started looking for you before I even entered the village," He looked away from her gaze and added, "I wanted to be able to find you right away,"_

* * *

"So I guess we don't get to see that fight that left off on that cliff hanger. Just great," Keldeo complained.

_Cliff: "Can't. Hold. On. Much. LONGE-" *SNAP!* "AHHHHHHHHH-!" *SPLAT!*_

"Drew is upset by this and won't let Ash get away with it, but Ash decides to beat him at his own game by challenging him to a Ponyta race. . .instead of something interesting, like, oh, I don't know- _A POKEMON BATTLE!"_

* * *

_"The trail around Blue Moon Lake," He stated instantly, "It's been used for any racing or jousting tournament for the past decade."_

_Drew looked Ash up and down in evaluation, "Tomorrow at high noon," He stated in more of a statement the a question._

* * *

"What is this a western? Where's the tumbleweed?" Keldeo asked in amusement, "So, May decides to leave the Festival early, but Ash tracks her down and they have their first real kiss."

* * *

_He didn't let her finish as he wrapped his arms around her waist and then leaned in and placed a tender, yet passionate kiss on her lips. May went wide eyed in shock until the warmth she felt took over, making her close her eyes, and arms wrap around his neck pulling him closer to deepen the kiss._

_The two stood underneath the pale blue glow of the moon, desperately releasing the pent up emotions of the past few weeks. The princess forced herself to break the kiss with great reluctance. Her chest heaved in and out as she caught her breath looking into the Aura Guardians eyes. She slowly brought a hand up to her lips where she could still feel the warm sensation on Ashs._

_"I've been wanting to do that for a while…" Ash said sheepishly to break the silence._

_She was still speechless over what just took place. Three things ran through her mind as she gazed at the handsome young man of her desires. One was that Ash felt the same way as her, two being she had never felt closer to someone before in her life, and finally that she loved him. Not a crush, but truly loved him._

_"A-Ash…" She was speechless; she wanted to say anything, something to respond to his actions. But nothing came to her mind._

_He smiled softly and looked into her sparkling blue eyes. He reached into his tunic and produced a dark blue rose. "You left before I could give you this…" He said softly handing her the rose._

_Her mouth parted slightly at the rose. It was unlike the others you bought during the festival which were dyed. This rose was a darker shade, and actually blue. No artificial colors, "It's beautiful," She whispered in awe, "Where did you get it?"_

_"An Aura Guardians secret," He stated knowingly flashing her his toothy grin._

_The princess smiled softly, the rose was absolutely mesmerizing. The petals on the outside were dark before becoming gradually light towards the center. The colors were familiar, as if she'd seen them recently. She looked up from the rose and into his eyes, where she saw a brief flicker of blue in his irises, "Aura…"_

_He nodded slowly in confirmation, "Aura is a mysterious ability, even Guardians are unsure of its full capabilities."_

_"Thank you…"She said softly wrapping her arms around his waist and laying her head onto his chest._

_Ash gently ran a hand through her long hair, "No thanks are necessary…" He trailed off before adding with a small smile, "My princess,"_

* * *

Keldeo sighed, "Look, I know it's an alternate universe adaption, and the characters are bound to be different from the Anime counterparts, but I still feel that Ash is acting way too Gary Stuish here. I'm really sorry, but to me, this isn't Ash."

"And another thing, you know what's missing from this story? Any central conflict! I mean, first we have the kidnapping, but that's resolved. Then the murders, and that's resolved. Heck, that was resolved OFFSCREEN! We should have been allowed to see that fight! Pikachu hasn't done anything, so why is he here except to just sit on Ash's shoulder like in the Anime. But that's pointless because this isn't Ash! And what about the conflict in the summary? With the agreement with the kings and stuff! We need something to focus on!"

"Oh, and one more thing: do you know what _else _is missing from this _Pokemon _Fan Fictio-_HELLO! WHERE ARE THE POKEMON!? _The only Pokemon we've seen are some Ponytas, Ash's Pikachu, and May's Eevee. Yeah, May has an Eevee. An Eevee that does _nothing_! That Eevee does _nothing _in this story! And we have an _Aura Guardian, _and yet we haven't seen the tail of a Riolu or Lucario! What, are all the Pokemon dying out or something? What kind of world is this? Why not just set this in a world without Pokemon. Use normal horses! And Pikachu doesn't do anything either, which is sad, because I _want _to see Pikachu play a larger role in this. I want Pokemon battles, not _Legend of Zelda _cutscenes!"

Suddenly, a tiny figure appeared right in front of Keldeo's face.

"AHHH!" Keldeo shouted as he shyed away in fear.

"No, Keldeo! There's so much more to this FanFic than you give it credit for!" the small white and orange eared Pokemon cheered.

"Victini?" Keldeo said in disbelief.

Victini spun around and posed victoriously, "The one and only! Look, there is a lot more good to this FanFic that you're not seeing."

Keldeo sighed, "Sorry, Victini, but this FanFic does not seem at all like a _Pokemon_ FanFic! It's like, only 5% Pokemon!"

Victini laughed and said, "So? That doesn't make it bad. You just gotta get...MORE INTO IT!"

Victini gathered a sphere of fire around his body as he readied a Searing Shot. Keldeo dropped to the ground and covered his head as the fire around Victini exploded outward. When Keldeo regained the nerve to look, he saw, to his shock, that Victini was dressed like Red Link from _Four Swords._

"What the-? Why do you look like Mario at a Zelda convention?" Keldeo asked.

Victini laughed heartily and drew his sword. "Doncha see, Keldeo?! If you want to truly enjoy this FanFic, you have to just forget it's a Pokemon FanFic, AND GIVE YOURSELF TO THE STORY!"

"What?" Keldeo asked.

"You see, Keldeo. This whole FanFic is a medieval fairy tale experience!" Victini cheered, "Sure; Ash, May, and the rest of them don't act like they do in the Anime, but that doesn't matter here! This needs to be taken as a stand alone story! Enjoy the medieval theme!"

Keldeo nodded, "Oh alright. Then answer this: Why didn't ThatOneDwarf just write a stand alone story on FictionPress instead of using Pokemon characters for no reason?"

"Huh?" Victini asked.

"The whole point of FanFiction is to use characters that you like from the series that you love. But if you're going to completely rewrite the character's personality, then why not just make them your own original characters in your own original story! The Pokemon in this story don't do anything, so why does this have to be a Pokemon world?" Keldeo complained.

Victini pouted, but then he smiled and raised his sword. "I understand! You just don't get it! Let me enlighten you!" Victini swirled his sword around expertly as he began to rap.

_Most FanFics play it cool,_  
_The like to follow the Cannon's rules_  
_But here, ThatOneDwarf will have none of it!_  
_The content here's a flame,_  
_Just speak this FanFic's name,_  
_And you will see! _

_People love it!_

_But maybe I'm deluded!_  
_But aren't the scenes well-suited?_  
_Who cares if it's not Cannon?_  
_It's fun!_

_So let go of your fear!_  
_Grab a frothy root beer!_  
_I know you think it's all wrong,_  
_But I praise in a rap song!_

_Because it's dark and gritty,_  
_The Kingdom setting is witty!_  
_And even if it's silly,_  
_It's fun!_

Victini spun around and crossed his arms giving a double victory sign.

_Word to your dam!_

Keldeo's eye twitched as he glared daggers at Victini. "My dam is dead," Keldeo said in a dead serious tone.

Victini's eyes widened. "Oh. . .well. . .this is awkward. . .well I-"

_WHOOOOOSH!_

Keldeo sent Victini flying into the distance with a double blast of Hydro Pump from his hooves.

Keldeo took a long deep breath and let it out slowly.

"Why does Joshscorcher like him so much?" he said.

"So the next day, Ash and Drew have their race, and come on. You know Ash is gonna win. Why even bother-"

* * *

_The pair was neck and neck as they entered the dimly lit forest. Drew glanced left to Ash and kicked out with his leg, catching Ash by surprise and hitting him in the shoulder, knocking him half way off of the saddle._

* * *

Keldeo jumped in surprise. "Oh. . . Okay, so Drew wins by cheating. . .which means he didn't really win at all."

* * *

_"I was hoping to ask you this last night at the festival; however I had been unable to find you until just before you left. But there is truly no better time, than on the eve of a victory to ask you," He got down on one knee and produced a solid gold ring from his pocket, "Will you be my Queen?"_

_In an instant, May felt all the color drain from her face as she stared disbelievingly at gold ring, the sunlight dancing across its surface. This could not be happening. No. No no no no no! She couldn't say yes! She… She looked away from the ring to Ash who remained stoic throughout the exchange, she met his eyes asking, no pleading him to get her out of this._

_She saw him take in a deep breath before exhaling slowly. Then in an almost unnoticeable movement he nodded his head slightly. Before his eyes returned to the Prince, an ice cold glare driving through his back._

* * *

"Now, of course, May is horrified and repulsed by this and quickly says no-"

* * *

_She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "Drew… I a-accept…" She finished in just above a whisper._

* * *

Keldeo looked extremely angry. " . . . . Okay. . . . .Princess Moron. . . .cause that's what you are, a moron. . .there was _nothing _forcing you to say yes! Did you forget that comment he made about you? The one that caused you to slap him? And speaking of that, why is Drew doing this if it's clear that May doesn't like him. She slapped him across the face! I'd understand if Drew wanted to marry her because she was a Princess and he wanted her money and power, but Drew is already a Prince! He already has money and power! What's the point!? These choices make no sense! I mean, it's like saying:"

_"Doctor, I have heart disease."_

_"Well, I'd recommend eating fried foods."_

_". . . .You don't think I should. . .eat more vegetables?"_

_"Oh no, eating fried foods is a better idea."_

_". . .Well. . .okay. . .if you say so."_

_"Fried foods."_

_"Fried foods."_

Keldeo growled frustratedly, "Grrr. This is just too stupid. I need a break. Watch this commercial while I watch scenes from Disney's _Frozen."_ Keldeo walked off.

* * *

_**KELDEO **_

_**THE CRITIC**_

_We'll be right back after these messages!_


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	6. A Guardian's Princess- Part Two

_**Keldeo the Critic!**_

Keldeo reared up on his hind legs, his expression serious and his Secret Sword raised and glowing brightly.

**Keldeo the Critic- Season Three**

**"A Guardian's Princess" by ThatOneDwarf**

"Well, after May shows that she falls right into the useless princess trope, The Hero of Time, uh, I mean Ash, receives his final test that will determine if he becomes an official Aura Guardian."

* * *

_Unwinding the scroll, his eyes roamed over the words that were inscribed on the sheet. His mouth dropped open at one point, where he looked up from the scroll and to Alyssa. "They can't be serious?" He whispered in disbelief._

_"What is it?"_

_He handed her the parchment for herself to read, she set down her drink and began to read. After a moment of silence, she looked up from the scroll and pursed her lips in a tight line. She shook her head slightly before handing it back to Ash, "To go after that… Thing is suicide," She stated softly her eyes meeting his, "But…" God she couldn't believe the council, "They are your orders,"_

_He nodded slightly before sitting back down on the arm of the chair, "But it killed Drake, and damn well near maimed Lanced. If two Guardians couldn't take out… This," He waved parchment briefly, "Then how do they expect me to accomplish this?"_

* * *

_'I can't fight Ganondorf yet! I don't have enough Heart Containers!'_

Keldeo chuckled, "Okay, okay, seriously now, there's an evil creature in this? Is it a Pokemon? A Legendary? The Bittercold? Dark Rust? A human in disguise? Well forget all that interesting stuff for now, we have a useless Princess to get back to!"

* * *

_"This isn't a game, I know." He paused looking back down to the scroll, "But if I wait a few months, the wedding could have already taken place… And," He swallowed once before looking up to who he considered a mother, "If I'm going to stop it, I'll have to have my focus completely on that…"_

* * *

"Yeah, forget the evil monster loose in the kingdom killing innocent people, you got a wedding to stop!"

* * *

_"After the race, Drew proposed… It was sudden, says he planned on doing it during the festival but didn't get the chance because May left early,"_

_"And she said yes?!"_

_He nodded with the barest traces of a scowl, "She had to, that-"_

_"But I don't love him!" Ash and Dawn snapped their gazes to the brunette as she grabbed her fathers hands with tears in her eyes._

_"He'll grow on-"_

_"No he wont!" She yelled hoarsely, her lively blue eyes on the verge of releasing her tears._

_"May your being unreason-"_

_"No you are, this is so unfair!"_

_"May you need to calm down," Max interrupted cautiously going over to try and calm his sister._

_She turned furiously on him, "Calm down? Calm Down!? How can I calm down when I'm going to be marrying someone I despise!?"_

* * *

Keldeo's face was a mask of disgust. " . . . Okay. . .Princess Moron. . . .cause that's what you are, a moron. . . .Why did you say yes?! Oh my gosh, you are the _polar opposite_ of Princess Twilight Sparkle! Now you're going to need your parents to bail you out-."

* * *

_ "May honey, you may not love Drew at the moment, but over time that will change," Caroline said softly trying to reassure her daughter._

* * *

"-unless being an moron runs in the family!" Keldeo groaned.

_GLaDOS: "You're not just a regular moron. you were **designed** to be a moron."_

"And if you think I'm being overly sarcastic, and if you think I'm being too hard on Princess May, well guess what May does next? She reveals that she's been in love with Ash the whole time _right in front of the King and Queen. _Princess Daisy is a better Princess than May! _The Midnight Dragon _was a better Princess than May! Sure she was evil, but at least she was in control of things."

"Well, luckily, the King doesn't have Ash's head cut off, because in the midst of all these fairy tale tropes, the one trope not used is the 'King is a jerk who won't let his daughter marry a commoner because he's a jerk' trope. It turns out that the King is okay with Ash, but May _has _to marry Drew because of. . .political problems. . .

* * *

_"When my wife was taken for ransom by the Sinneye Warriors during a diplomatic visit to Sinnoh, I wanted to take the army and storm their keep without hesitation. But I couldn't, I had dealings with trade routes between us Kanto and the Orange Archipelago that had to have new treaty's written before war broke loose."_

_He paused and turned his gaze to the young man, "I had to leave her as prisoner for over six months because of those treaty's, because I could not allow war to break loose."_

_"The situation is the same now, to call off this wedding, something that has been in the making for well over a decade would cause not only distrust between Hoenn and Johto, but for future agreements between Hoenn and other Regions such as Kanto,"_

_Ash remained silent as the king continued, "Now tell me… Young Ash, do you understand the implications of what I'm dealing with?"_

_"Yes your Majesty," He replied meeting the Kings gaze._

_"My daughter has taken a shine to you, and as much as I want her to be happy, this agreement between Alexander and I holds the future of our Regions together," He paused reflectively, "Are her feelings reciprocated?"_

_Ash swallowed nervously, "Yes your Majesty,"_

_"And for that I'm sorry, twenty years ago when Alexander and his armies allied with us to repel the Kantian Forces, the agreement that my May would marry his eldest son when they were of age was made. I had agreed solely on the necessity of the situation, we were giving ground quickly and having Alexander threatening to pull out his forces before we had many more casualties caused me to agree to his proposal."_

* * *

"Well, okay, that's a good reason, I suppose," Keldeo narrowed his eyes in anger, "But you know, if we had known about this _earlier_, then May wouldn't have looked like such a tool when she said yes. And since we already identify May as not to bright, that destroys our respect for the character!"

"So the King orders Ash not to see May anymore, but _of course, _Ash defies that order and sees May one last time."

* * *

_He walked her over to her bed and sat her down, "Your father has banned us from seeing each other,"_

_She felt her heart plummet, "What?" A tear streaked its way down her cheek._

_Ash sat down next to her and took her hands, "He doesn't want me socializing with you because come the wedding it'll be harder on you afterwards."_

_Her mouth moved wordlessly as she tried to think of something to say, "Technically I'm committing treason right now just by seeing you,"_

_"Ash I can't do this," She whispered as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, "I can't marry Drew, I-I can't be apart from you…"_

_"What you said, did you mean it?" He asked softly lifting the Princesses chin up so he could see her eyes._

_She nodded slightly, "I love you Ash," She whispered as fresh tears began cascading down her cheeks._

_A small smile touched his lips, "Well then you'll be glad to know that I love you May," Before she could respond he brought his lips down and placed them on hers._

_After a brief moment of shock, she responded with everything she had. Her heart and body were on fire, she kissed him passionately leaning back so that she lay on her bed and that he was on top of her._

_She broke the kiss briefly to catch her breath before claiming his lips once again, her hands ran through his hair, knocking off his hat in the process. He broke the kiss but she removed a hand from his hair and gripped his collar pulling him back to her._

_"May?" He pulled back only to have himself pulled back down._

_"May," He said a little more forcefully as she pulled him down and changed their position so that she was pinning him to the bed._

* * *

Keldeo's eyes widened in horror. "Oh my gosh, they're having a sex scene. They're having a sex scene. That's it, GAME OVER, MAN! GAME OV-"

* * *

_It was outstandingly hard to keep himself from going along with the Princess, taking a tremendous amount of restraint as she rested her forehead against his in confusion, "What?" She whispered breathlessly._

_"We can't do this," He said seriously gently lifting her off of him._

_"What?"_

_"We can't do this, not now anyways."_

* * *

Keldeo took a few quick shallow breaths and eventually calmed down. He sprayed water at his face from his hoof and shook the moisture out of his mane. He shrugged and said, "Tell me you wouldn't have been surprised if this had gone in that direction."

* * *

_"I need you to be honest with me," She nodded taking his hands, "Do you want me to stop this wedding,"_

_"Of course!" She exclaimed quietly._

_"Listen, right now I've only got one way of stopping this. And that's by murder,"_

* * *

Keldeo started fuming as he jumped off his rock and stuck his head in the water and thrashed around in the shallows. He pulled his head and pointed angrily at the screen before abruptly calming down.

"I don't care for that," Keldeo said calmly. Then he sighed and said, "Look, _Friendship is Witchcraft _is evil incarnate for a lot of reasons, and this story is by no means as bad as that abomination. But the fact that _Foaly Matripony _and this fanfic both have the main character turn to _murder _in the name of love just increases my undying hatred for Jennie, Griffin, and the rest of the Sherclop Pones staff even more."

Keldeo nodded solemnly, "Therefore, since we all know that Ash would _never_ try to murder anyone; with the obvious exceptions of in war or self defense, which is technically not murder anyways; I have decided to not call this character 'Ash' anymore. Instead, he will hereafter be known as 'Link.'"

"So, after deciding to _murder_ Drew when he gets back, Link goes off to fight the mysterious creature. And you know, if this guy is plotting to murder someone in cold blood, I'd be fine if he gets eaten by this creature." Keldeo snickered and tapped his snout three times. "Keep in mind, this guy is not Ash."

"So Link goes to meet Baron MacArthur about fighting this creature."

* * *

_"Baron MacArthur," Ash greeted holding out his hand._

_MacArthur stood up and took his hand in a firm handshake, "Please drop the pleasantries Ash, it's a pleasure to see you again," He gestured for Ash to take a seat._

_Ash grinned and took the offer, "And you too Jeffery."_

_"I was surprised to say the least when I received your letter a week ago, would you mind filling me in on your reasons for coming all the way out to Lavaridge?"_

_"I've been given the assignment of dealing with the creature from Mt. Chimney," He saw the flash of concern enter the Barons eyes immediately._

_"Is Lady Cloud with you?"_

_"I'm on my own for this assignment,"_

_"You do know what happened to Lance and Drake don't you?"_

_He nodded thoughtfully, "Yes, it's unfortunate. But it was really the reason I decided to make a stop here before starting the climb,"_

_"And why is that?"_

_"Would it be possible for me to go and visit Lance, I take it he still has residence in the castle?"_

_Jeffery nodded to himself, "Of course, he's been recuperating for some weeks now in the recovery ward. If you'd like I could have Phillip bring you to him,"_

_"Id be thankful for that," He stood up and offered his hand to the Baron, "I'll come by after the job is done, let you know if there is anything left to worry about."_

* * *

_'Or at least my ghost will come by.'_

"So Ash goes and speaks with the injured Lance."

* * *

_Ash sat down on a cot opposite of the red haired Guardian, "I've been tasked with killing whatever did this," He gestured to Lances side, "To you and Drake,"_

_He raised a surprised eyebrow, "This is no job for an apprentice lad," Lance cautioned, "That dragon-"_

_"Dragon?" Ashs voiced was laced with confusion, there were no dragons left. After the Great Hunt of Debenshi well over four century's ago, all dragons within Kanto, Johto, Hoenn and Sinnoh had been extinct. All except for the legendary beasts of course._

* * *

Keldeo is scandalized, "No. . .No. . .Oh my gosh. . .Noooooooooooo-no-no-no-no-nooooooo-" A look of horror suddenly passed in front of Keldeo's face. "Oh my gosh. . . I just figured it out! OH MY GOSH! I KNOW WHO HELPED WRITE THIS FANFIC!"

**_Meanwhile, thousands of miles away. . . ._**

Georgia the Dragon Buster laughed as she sat in a chair while talking on a phone. "You gotta admit it, Dwarf! That Dragon-Type Genocide plot point that I thought of was genius. The thoughts of millions and millions of Dragon-Type Pokemon being brutally slaughtered as they scream in intense pain just fills my cold Dragon Busting heart with glee!"

_**Back in the Moor of Icirrus with Keldeo. . .**_

"From the Equestria's multicolored heart I stamp at thee!" Keldeo chanted as he quickly typed out an instant message in his laptop and sent it.

A Rainbow Power attack shot up from the land of Equestria and traversed time and space.

_**Back with Georgia. . . **_

"Wait a minute," Georgia said as a strange sound reached her ears. She looked up and screamed in terror as a huge rainbow colored magical beam crashed down on top of her.

_**Back with Keldeo. . .**_

Keldeo breathed out in relief. "It is done. . .but her evil will never truly go away," he said seriously, "There was no reason to put something so gruesome in this FanFic. I consider many Dragon-Types to be my friends. Axew. Charizard. The Voice of Life. And many others. A genocide of any Pokemon-Type is _not _something to be taken lightly. Period."

". . . .so. . .where was I?"

* * *

_"Ay, they've been calling me insane for even saying this, but what killed Drake and injured me was a dragon boy."_

* * *

"A dragon boy-WHAT IS GOING ON!? Is this a Rule 63 Midnight Dragon or something? Wow, this story gets worse and worse with every sentence!"

"Well, okay, Link is after a dragon boy. . .I guess. . .meanwhile, May and Alyssa talk about the past and how Link was an orphan that Alyssa trained, because Alyssa was an orphan that her mentor trained. . .okay. . ."

* * *

_"Were his parents murdered?"_

_At this Alyssa hesitated, taking a longer sip of her drink then necessary, "His father was killed in battle, his mother murdered…"_

_"They died during the war?" She whispered uncertainly._

_"They did, at the end of it. Right before we pulled out of Viridian."_

_May set her cup down thoughtfully, "Why haven't you ever told him this? It's something he's curious about you know,"_

_"With the way things are going, he'll be learning soon enough. Which is why if you see him when he returns from Lavaridge you must promise me that you will not tell him of this conversation."_

_"I promise,"_

* * *

Keldeo clutched his skull, "Oh can we please get to the Dragon fight! I need some action! I'm so bored!"

* * *

_The moon shone brightly down on the rider who rode wearily down the main street of Petalburg Village, a hood drawn over their head concealing their face from sight._

_The Ponyta plodded along, it's white coat covered in soot, dirt, and sweat. It faltered in its step, causing the rider to sway uneasily in the saddle._

_"Little further boy…" The hoarse voice came from beneath the hood. His body ached; a gash on his chest that was hastily repaired had once again reopened. His eyes fluttered shut, and his grip on the pummel loosened._

* * *

Keldeo's mouth fell open. "How did that happen! Was there a battle? Did he run into the Dragon boy? I mean, is the author just too lazy? Do you really think we care more about May's wedding plans than Link's Pokebattling action? I feel like I'm watching the Twilight movies here!"

* * *

_"Rider drop the hood and identify yourself or we will sho-" She stopped as the rider swayed slightly before dropping to the ground like a sack of potatoes._

_She slid off of Flare, arrow still at full draw as she started towards the fallen rider._

_Her eyes remained fixated on the rider, who had yet to move, "Identi-"_

_"Pikapi!?"_

_No… Her heartbeat picked up as she saw the electric mouse crawl out of the saddle bag and over to the rider._

_She ran across the drawbridge, replacing the arrow back into the quiver, and slinging the bow back onto her shoulder._

_She ignored the slight commotion behind her as she got down onto her knees and rolled the rider over. Ash… "Ash," She took him by the shoulders and shook him gently, "Ash!"_

_With no reply she brought her hand to his neck, blinking at the sudden appearance of blood on her hands. She could feel a slight pulse, it was there. But it was feint._

* * *

"So, apparently Link had an epic battle _that we didn't get to see _that really messed him up and left him inches from death. Well, looks like Drew is safe."

"Well, Alyssa uses her Aura powers to try and wake Ash up."

* * *

_"Ash wake up!"_

_"It's… It's gone…" His voice was strained, and his eyes remained shut._

_"Get him some water!" She ordered the nurse; she turned back to the boy and placed a hand on his cheek turning his face towards her, "What's gone Ash," She asked softly, "What's gone?"_

_The nurse returned with a canteen of water and brought it to the boys lips as Alyssa held his head up, once the water got down his throat he sighed tiredly, "I… I gotta find Aly, the egg…"_

_"I'm right here Ashy," She replied soothingly running a hand through his greasy hair, "What egg?"_

_His lips sounded something, barely audible. "Ash, come on what egg?" She asked giving him a gentle shake._

_He groaned at being moved, his face scrunching up in pain and pure exhaustion, "Got... Stolen… need, need…"_

_His voice trailed off only to be replaced by deep breathing_

* * *

Keldeo threw up his hooves, "Well, that's great. It's a mystery. . .which is kinda pointless because Link wakes up completely in the next scene!"

* * *

_Pack your things Aly we gotta leave. Now!" He spoke rapidly trying to stand up but was held down by the blonde._

_"You're going to fast Ash, slow down. What happened?"_

_"T-The dragons dead, but the egg. The egg Aly it was stolen!" He hissed through his teeth, "We have to get it back!"_

_She blinked trying to understand what he was going on about, "Dragon?" she asked in amusement._

_He shook his head at her tone, "Don't grin like that, if that egg hatches we're going to be in trouble. It's smart, it knew what I was doing, it-it-it knew why Lance and Drake were up on the mountain, that's why it attacked. It was protecting the egg!" He was frantic, making the blonde worried._

* * *

"Okay. So the dragon was protecting an egg. And it seems the egg got stolen. Now, I have to give the author credit. He _does_ show us Link's battle with the dragon in a flashback, and it was pretty epic," Keldeo said with an excited smile.

* * *

_Standing on to large hind legs, and two small arms, was a seven foot long orange __dragon_ with a long neck, two massive wings, and a long tail with a flame on the tip. It turned its long neck to look at the Guardian.

* * *

"Oh, it's a Charizard! Of course. Because as we all know, Charizards are _NOT DRAGON-TYPES!_ They're _Fire/Flying-Types!_ What, are you crazy?! You'd be better off putting Spike the Dragon in this story!" Keldeo exclaimed, "And why did Lance say it was a _'dragon boy'_? Did he mean a male dragon? Then why didn't he say that? Why did he even have to say its gender!" Keldeo sighed, "Whatever, let's just enjoy the battle!"

* * *

_Lance had said to keep it at a distance, but his arrows were powerless. The scales on the dragon were to strong, and the only vulnerable – or so he believe- spot was the tan underlining on the belly or tail. He found this out by getting lucky, his arrow had ricocheted off the ground and up into its belly, causing it falter in its flight._

_But that had been fifteen arrows ago._

_He licked his lips as he felt a tremble behind him, Come on Pi… Get em when he's coming for another Ariel attack._

_Ash sprinted out from cover, surprising the dragon as it rounded on him with a wild swing from its tail. The tail caught him in the gut, sending him flying back into the boulder in which he came. The bow fell from his grasp, as he desperately tried to ignore the pain in his lower back._

_The dragon crawled victoriously towards him, he could see the flames preparing in its jaws, he figured briefly that it may want to cook him before he had his insides torn out._

_Opening its jaws Ash braced himself for the searing heat that would encase him._

_"CHUUUUUU!" In surprise he dove right as a massive arc of lighting thundered down from the sky. The bolt struck the dragon, causing it bellow a furious pained call into the sky._

_Ash grabbed the hilt of his sword, while he had the chance. Tearing the sword from its scabbard he stood up and swung a wide uppercut towards the dragon's throat. There was a slight screech as the steel broke through the scales and into the soft flesh beneath._

_It choked, it was brief but before he could get in another stroke he was thrown aside as he was impaled once again by the powerful tail._

_He scrambled across the ground for his bow, "PI HIT IT AGAIN!" He yelled as the flames of the dragons tail shrunk dramatically._

_Another chu sounded shocking the dragon as he picked up his bow and nocked both of his remaining arrows. He sighted on the dragons skull, the pain and furry in its black eyes threw him off slightly, but he ignored it._

_The two arrows hissed towards the dragon, the first denting its scales and bouncing off uselessly as the other arrow pierced the scales and drove itself into the fire breathers head._

_The screech that it released caused Ash to drop his bow to the ground and cover his ears. The dragon cried out in pain, staggering away from Ash and towards the cave entrance. The pain it felt was genuine, Ash could feel it with each high pitched whine._

_With one last grunted he ran forward, sidestepping a final attempted snap at his arm and brought the sword up in a wide arc, slamming the blade directly into the cut from before._

_Severing the head from the body._

* * *

Keldeo had an empty look on his face. "Gosh. . .I know I've been calling him Link for a while but. . .think about it. . .Ash . . .just killed Charizard. . .This calls for a moment of silence. . ."

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"Okay, back to the horrible Fan Fic."

* * *

_Ash rubbed his chin, "It was defending the egg… It was defending the egg Pi…"_

_"Pika pikachu pikachu…"_

_He nodded sucking on his teeth, "Imagine the possibilities… Being able to… Domesticate a dragon… This is a better defense than ten knights. Three trained dragons would be devastating!"_

* * *

"So it seems that Link took the egg with the intention of using it as a weapon of mass destruction for his kingdom. . .okay," Keldeo said bitterly, "But the joke's on Link because, as we know, other knights stole it from him during the return trip."

* * *

_"Ash show me on a map where this took place, I'll go after them while you-"_

_"Absolutely not," He argued back quickly, "You're not doing this alone."_

_Her blue eyes narrowed dangerously, "Ash Ketchum you are to not leave Petal-"_

_"I've got to go after them Aly," He said completely serious, "It's my fault that they even got away, I was unprepared, thus it's my responsibility."_

_"He'll go with you Alyssa," Norman stated slowly ignoring the glare sent to him by his top Guardian, "He is a fully fledged Guardian in all but ink after all…"_

_The blonde blinked in response, until her shoulders relaxed slightly and a saddened smile crossed her lips, "I suppose he's right, all we need to do is…" She shook her head slightly, "You'll rest for a few hours while I go find you a new bow and another quiver. Change once you're up to standing and then we'll head off,"_

* * *

"Oh, and he also gives Drew a piece of his clothing. Why?" Keldeo shrugged his shoulders, "I don't know. _I don't know!"_

"Well, Link and May kiss some more and he keeps talking about stopping the wedding. Uh, there's a dangerous dragons egg out there. I think that's a little more important than the wedding. The next scene is Link and Alyssa heading after the enemy knights in vicious combat, who turn out to be from the Johto Kingdom. This could mean war. Add in the fact that Drew is going to take May to Johto, and you got a powder keg ready to explode."

* * *

_Ash jerk his sword so that the cross piece was atop the blade, and swung his elbow back as hard as he could beneath the helmet and into the Knights jaw._

_A groan and he toppled over. Ash dove atop of him, and pressed the blade against his throat, "Who sent you?" He hissed pressing into the soft flesh, "Who sent you to kill me?"_

_The voice that came back to him was weak and whispered, he listened carefully and pressed a little deeper, "Where is the egg? Did it hatch!?"_

_The knight shook his head, which proved to be the mistake that cost him his life as the blade cut cleanly through his throat and sever his windpipe._

_Ash stared at the choking man, and got up off his feet. A door lay to his right, and he knew Alyssa was entering the room behind him. Opening the door, he brought the sword up defensively and flicked his eyes around the room._

_Empty, dusty, broken tables, and in the corner a sack and the orange egg wrapped in cloth. "Aly,"He spoke quietly and started forward, "We've got it…"_

_He got down to a knee and examined the egg, no cracks; it was warm, and seemed to be harm free. He scooped it carefully up into his arms, and looked at the sack that should be holding the scales he pried off of the dragon's corpse._

_Using his free hand, he opened the top and saw the glimmering orange. Tying the mouth of the bag into a knot, he picked it up and started towards the blond, "What a day huh?" He asked with a weary smile._

_She smiled back at him and ruffled his hair, "You still surprise me Ashy, every day. Not many would be able to shoot a bolt out of the air, thank you for that."_

_He simply smiled at her which conveyed his response clearly, she reached out and felt the egg. It had been a long time since she had seen one, not since she had been given the option of having a Riolu, which she chose not to._

_"Is it close to hatching?" Ash asked._

_He handed her the egg and she placed a hand across the surface, closing her eyes she felt Aura wash over her and across of the egg, "Soon… But not quite yet, a few more days I believe."_

_She handed him back the egg in exchange for the sack, "We're not done yet," She said starting for the door._

_His eyebrows furrowed as they stepped out into the night sky, "We're not returning back to Petalburg?"_

_After a brief pause, "We need to speak with the council, seeing as how you are a fully fledged Guardian. And I'd like to speak with Cynthia about recent events, there's something we need to discuss that we can't delay much longer."_

_"And what's that?"_

_She watched as Pikachu hopped onto his shoulder and peered curiously at her, "Not now, you'll be learning soon enough,"_

_And with that he'd have to be content._

_Yes he was curious, but he could wait. If it involved him, Alyssa had her reasons, that was something he had learned long ago._

* * *

"Wait. . .so they got the egg back? Just like that? That's it? What's with all these tiny plots that get resolved instantly?! We've had four action conflicts so far and they've all been taking back seat to this annoying 'stop the wedding' plot that sounds like something out of a Mewtwofangirl video!"

_(Dear Mewtwofangirl, please don't take offense at that statement. I LOVE __you all your Zoroark/Lucario videos.)_

"So we see the Guardian Councils Temple, and we learn the first Aura Guardian was Red. Ha-ha, I see what you did there. Oh, and Cynthia is the leader. I guess that makes sense."

* * *

_ "Place your hand here and focus your Aura."_

_Gingerly he reached out and placed a hand on the smooth stone, closing his eyes, the cool feeling washed over him, and then he felt the stone beneath him tremble._

_His eyes opened, and he stared in disbelief as the bricks pushed into the wall, and slid right. Revealing a rectangular door way, "Alyssa…" He whispered quietly, "What…"_

_"Come," She stepped into the doorway, he followed after her._

_A straight staircase leading down into the ground greeted him almost immediately; torches lining the walls, blue flames blazing brightly._

_When they came to the bottom, he felt the Aura radiating from the door at the end of the hall. A plain wooden door with a bronze knob greeted them, he looked back and she gave him the nod to open it._

_When he did, his jaw drooped open, and he took in the sight with awe._

_A large circular room, the walls housed nothing but shelves._

_Shelves that radiated a blue and green like oceans water from tulip like plants. They seemed to be made of crystal, there had to hundreds of them, lining the circumference of the room. In the center though, stood a single stone pillar that he supposed would reach his chest. On it?_

_A single crystalline plant._

_All of the Guardians stood around the circumference of the pillar, about six meters back in a perfect circle. Hands clasped at the small of their backs, and feet spread apart. Alyssa came up beside him, "This is the Library," Her tone startled him, it was nothing but a whisper, but he could here the fear in her voice._

_"We record the important events of our history, from riots, assassinations… To wars."_

* * *

"That's right! It's the Time Flower from _Lucario and the Mystery of Mew. _And Ash, yeah I'm gonna go back to calling him Ash now, learns through a Time Flower vision that he was actually the son of the evil king of Kanto, and was saved by the Aura Guardians. . .okay. . ."

* * *

_"This is your father's sword," He snapped out of his gaze and looked to Alyssa, "Norman took it with him after he left Viridian Castle. We recovered it from him for when the day where we told you the truth…"_

_He carefully slid the long sword back into its scabbard, and looked back to Alyssa. "It's yours now,"_

_His right hand dropped to where the sword he had retrieved from the outpost was, and unclipped it, letting it fall to the ground. He then clipped the scabbard to his hip and looked to Alyssa._

_He startled her as his arms found their way around her, and his head buried in her shoulder. And then he was crying, crying because she gave him a life, because she loved him, and saved him from being killed before he was even given a chance._

_Alyssa wrapped her arms tightly around him and shut her eyes tightly as tears threatened to escape, "I-I'm not mad," He whispered and her hold tightened, and shoulders sagged in relief._

_"Thank you for everything, I-I don't say it often, but I truly do love you mum, I really do!" His voice shook and he held her tighter, his mum, the woman who took him in on a whim that he'd become a Guardian, who saved him from death before he could even remember._

_"I love you so much Ash, I'm so sorry we couldn't have told you sooner!"_

_"I-I understand Aly, I was a liability, I truly understand, I can't be mad at you," He pulled back and gave her a light kiss on the cheek before looking over his shoulder at the other twelve Guardians, "Or any of you for that matter, you are all my family. I understand,"_

_And only then did Cynthia crack a small smile, her own eyes watering a little at his words._

* * *

"So. . .does that make Ash a Prince?"

* * *

_"Your father Jason was of the Royal bloodline, not your mother Delia Ketchum. He wanted a complete reform of the Kanto region. And he almost had that in the end."_

_Alyssa spoke up, "Your uncle in now the King, the brother of your father and heir to the throne since both you and your father were killed."_

_He had living relatives? "So since the Kingdom is still under the Gilead bloodline, you are the rightful heir to the throne of Kanto,"_

* * *

Keldeo shrugged, "Sure, why not. Oh, and let's throw in another reason to hate Drew even more."

* * *

_"None realized until late that there may be other reasons for the marriage. We're to believe that Drew marrying May is strictly so that he can become King, and then from there on both Hoenn and Johto would be used declare war on Kanto and conquer it for their own. Once the Princess and the Prince bear a child that is,"_

_The thought made his stomach twist into a knot, that May… He shook his head, "How do you know this?"_

_Alyssa this time, "Not until of late as Cynthia had said. The Knights who were sent after you, to kill you… There is only one person who would want you dead, and that would be Alexander,"_

_"But why at this time?" He exclaimed, "He knows not of my relationship with the Princess, nor does his bastard of a son!"_

_Cynthia spoke softly, "Or does he?" And Ashs eyes snapped to the Chief Guardian, "What if our King sent word to Johto, informing him of your infatuation and the damage that would be caused by you?"_

_"Lord Maple would not request for my death-"_

_"Nay, he may not. But what if Alexander sent his Knights to finish what he wanted twenty years before? Then the bloodline would be finished, and no one would ruin the marriage. Especially not by the one who was supposed to be killed along with his mother and father,"_

_Ash set his chair back up and sat down tiredly._

_"Why hasn't the King been notified of any of this? Surely he would cut the agreement in a hurry?"_

_"If he did go and do that, war would be declared, and since the Princess is no doubt settled in Johto, her life would be on the line. And no doubt be threatened-"_

_"Then I'll get her out!" Ash exclaimed slamming his hands down onto the table, "As her Guardian it is my duty to protect her!"_

_"Then protect her by becoming King!" Cynthia shouted in a voice that had him sitting back in his seat, "Lord Maple would not risk his daughter's life; he would consent with great reluctance to continue on with the agreement. Or else war would have his bloodline severed. He, the Queen, and the Prince would be killed-_

* * *

_"Ex-po-sition! Ex-po-sition! Pump it out AS - AP!"_ Keldeo and Munna sang.

"So, long story short, Ash has to become King and mary May in order to stop King Alexander and Prince Drew from taking over the world."

_**M. Bison:** "OF COURSE!"_

Keldeo covered his face with his hooves. "I am tired," he said, "I am so tired of this story." Keldeo uncovered his face and said, "You know what? I'm just going to fast forward through this thing and list all of the major events. If you want to read all the details and side plots, then read the story yourself. So hang onto something, because here we go:"

"The egg hatches into a Charmander and Ash bonds with it and names it Pyro."

**_The Pyro: _**_"Mmm-mmmm!"_

"Alyssa makes up a lie that Ash was killed in an ambush in order to buy him time to become King, _but doesn't tell May the truth for. . .reasons. . ._"

"Drew uses this rumor to torture May for no other reason except that he's arbitrarily evil."

"Ash and his Pokemon team fight off some Beedrill and make it to Viridian Castle in Kanto."

"Ash replaces Giovanni as the rightful King. Yeah, _Giovanni _just hands Ash the crown. _Giovanni!"_

"Alyssa slaps May for being a whiner and makes her be a brat to stall the wedding. . . instead of just _telling_ her that Ash is still alive. . ." Keldeo ground his teeth, "You seriously _can't _let May in on this secret! You're going to let her stew in her emotional pain! May is seriously hurting here! The way she's described here, it sounds like she's inches from suicide! You're only making things harder, Alyssa!"

**_GLaDOS:_ **_"Nice job breaking it hero."_

"May, Drew, and Alyssa reenact a scene from _The Dark Knight. _The one where the Joker meets Rachel and then Batman shows up."

* * *

_ "No harm meant Maybelle," His lip quirked and she heard the mockery in his voice, "I just came to tell you I think it is wonderful how you've come around about the wedding-" He paused and added, "and you've put me even further under your spell Princess, I love a woman who can fend for herself,"_

_"Than you've got to love me,"_

_The color drained from the Princes face, and May saw the terror enter those green eyes which tormented her. She actually felt like laughing out loud as he slowly turned to face the Guardian who stood directly behind him, light blue eyes watching him like a hungry pack of wolves._

_She wasn't armed, save for the bow over her shoulder, and quiver on her back, but her presence seemed to make him shrink, "I-I never touched her," The cold eyes which stared deep into his soul had him sweating bullets._

_Alyssa didn't respond right away, however the predatory grin which spread onto her lips had him cowering, "Of course you didn't, your highness, it seems it was the princess who was on the aggressive end of the spectrum this time around now wasn't it? Right my Lady?"_

* * *

"King Ash comes in with an army a fully evolved Charizard and stops the wedding."

"Ash and Drew have a duel, and Ash only kills Drew because May tosses him a dagger, in other words, he cheats. . .huh. . .it's like that Ponyta race in the beginning. We've come full circle."

_"HOLD ON A MINUTE!" _a voice shouted out.

Keldeo turned and gasped to see Terrakion jumping off of the nearby ledge and landing with a huge smashing splash next to where Keldeo stood.

"Don't you _dare _skim over this scene!" Terrakion shouted.

Keldeo frowned and shook his head, "No, no, no, it's just a mediocre sword fight scene-."

"Don't lie to me, Keldeo! you _like _this scene!"

The corners of Keldeo's mouth twitched nervously, along with his left eye. "N-no. . .I-"

Terrakion laughed hollowly, "HAH! Admit it, kid. Even you can't deny how earth-shatteringly awesome this sequence is!"

* * *

_Ash held his sword in a two handed grip, with the crosspiece level with his shoulder._

_Drew spun his sword flashily with one hand in an arc, and started towards him._

_Ash pressed his knees into Blazes sides, and the pony bolted into a sprint towards the prince._

_Drew took action and started in a gallop towards him._

_The ground rushed beneath him, but his eyes lay focused on the gleaming sword Drew held ready to strike._

_The kite shield and longsword, against his fathers broadsword._

* * *

Terrakion grinned, "The descriptions, the pacing, the action, it's just an epic cool scene!"

Keldeo shook his head furiously, averting his eyes from Terrakion's. "No, no, it's lame! It's predictable and cliched. Just like the rest of this Fanfic!"

Tango music suddenly started playing in the background, and Meloetta appeared and grabbed Keldeo's forehooves. She began pulling him along in a tango.

Terrakion laughed again and said, "No, kid, no! You have to acknowledge the coolness of the scene! With the scene there is tension! With tension there is epicness! With epicness there is the awesome action passion power climactic excitement!" Terrakion smiled knowingly, "Oh, but I understand! This Fan Fic's pretentiousness just drives you mad!"

Terrakion began singing along in his deep gravelly voice.

_Pretense!_

_He transforms characters elaborately!_

_It makes no sense,_

_How we take this FanFic so seriously!_

_So proud of the way he rips them apart,_  
_But a character change,_

_Doesn't make it art!_

_Pretense!_

* * *

_He may love using a sword, but his training as a Guardian had been imprinted into his mind._

_His true strength lay with ranged weaponry._

_And he wouldn't need Aura to dismount Drew._

_Drew rounded back towards him, grinning he saw, as the Prince saw that he was holding what could only look like dinner knives from that distance in his hands._

_Ash twirled the knives in his hands so that he held each by their tips, and with his left hand he drew back, and sent the blade spinning._

_Drew saw it at the last minute, pulling the shield in front of his body, deflecting the knife that had been aimed for his throat harmlessly away._

_He lowered his shield a fraction of an inch away from his body to glance at him, and when he did, Ash smirked._

_Drew doubled back off of his mount, the second knife, hilt first, took him square in the forehead._

_Ash watched him topple to the ground in a heap and started towards him._

_The horseplay was over, they would end it in a true bout of swordsmanship._

* * *

Keldeo looked back at Terrakion as he started to subconsciously lead his and Meloetta's dance. Keldeo's eyes wide with understanding, as he sang his own verse.

_Though in my heart I know it's asinine,_

_I respect the production design._

_Elements so diverse_  
_All the hours of editing you can tell,_

_Not to mention the vision_  
_to believe it would turn out well!_

* * *

_Drew scowled at him and charged._

_The Prince of Johto and King of Kanto clashed out in the open field, blades striking, cutting, and parrying in a daring display of brutality._

_Each stroke was countered, each moment of sure fire victory taken away by a perfectly timed parry or side step._

_They fought endlessly, back and forth, cut after cut, and then Ash slipped._

_His footing was off by a centimeter, his center of gravity off the mark which had him stumbling forward with the overhand cut he had swung at the Prince._

_Drew capitalized._

_Even without the use of Aura, what Ash felt was like slow motion._

_Drew sidestepped the mistimed stroke, cutting down on it with his own blade, which turned into an uppercut against his sword._

_His eyes never left his fathers sword as it was taken from his hand, twirling up into the air glimmering from the suns rays, and than point first into the ground a few meters away._

* * *

Terrakion marched around Keldeo and Meloetta as he sang another verse.

_Pretense!_

_Twilight__ Princess is where this sword duel is from!_

_Pretense!_

_Just write a crossover to make it not dumb._

_So proud of the way he made Ash a Stu!_  
_Ugh! And by the way who the heck is Drew?_

* * *

_Drew slashed at him, and when he went to dodge was cut off guard as Drews foot kicked him in the gut sending him to the ground._

_Winded, he barely had time to register the point of the blade which was driven towards his throat._

_His dragon scale coated gauntlets shot up and grasped the blade in its killing stroke, stopping it inches from his unarmored neck._

_Drew scowled at him, "It's over your Majesty," He taunted, "you're arms will give out, and when they do you'll be choking on steel and your own blood!"_

_His arms were getting extremely tired, and he was amazed he could still hold the sword at bay._

_"It's not over," He growled shoving with all his strength, "Until one of us is dead-" he heard it._

_Ash blinked, the world pulsing blue and grey and he looked to his army._

_In the grey sky, he saw the slow spinning of an object, and he knew exactly what it was._

_He had one chance, he would have to expend his remaining Aura to catch that knife within the space of a second and a half, while avoiding the killing stroke._

_His eyes locked on the knife, focused, concentrated, to him, it was the only object in the world._

_And then it sped up in this slowed time, spinning towards him rapidly._

_When it got to the point where it would hit him in two seconds he blinked._

_The world returned to normal._

_And faster then anyone could comprehend, Ash pushed the killing stoke to the side, releasing the tip so that it drove into the ground beside his neck, caught the dagger by the hilt with his right hand, and lunged up towards Drew._

_Ash shoved passed the kite shield which had proven to him to be a problem, and up beneath Drews left armpit, before rolling passed him towards his sword._

_Drew cried out as the steel was lodged into and out the back of his shoulder._

_He dropped the shield to the ground and growled as he tore the dagger free with his sword hand._

_"Dammit!" He shouted staring at his arm as he tried to move it._

_It didn't._

* * *

As Keldeo dipped Meloetta, she smiled and sang.

_There's no shame_  
_In liking something strange._  
_A rose by any other name_  
_is what it is_  
_And if you like it that's okay._

* * *

_Drew cut at him furiously, and he found it hard to find proper openings._

_He was on the defensive, but he knew that who ever made the first mistake would be the one to lose this duel._

_He parried a stab._

_And then Drew made the mistake._

_The Prince rebounded off of the stab with an uppercut which Ash met halfway with an underhand._

_The two swords clashed off against one another, but this time Ash had the advantage._

_The two handed power ripped the sword from Drew's hands, sending it high into the air much like it did his own._

_And before it hit the ground, Ash swung with his remaining strength towards Drew's neck._

_His arms were numb to the point where he didn't feel the minor resistance as the blue steel of his fathers sword sliced cleanly through the Princes neck._

_Ash found his breathing ragged, and then after a moment watched Drew's body crumple to the ground, head rolling off a few feet away._

* * *

Keldeo smiled and nodded, "Alright. I loved this scene. It was the best part of the story, hands down."

Terrakion and Meloetta both smiled and nodded back.

Keldeo sighed and said, "So, in conclusion, the evil King Alexander runs back to Johto with two arrows sticking out of him, Kanto and Sinnoh are united against the evil Johto Kingdom, Ash and May finally get married, and the epilogue ends with May saying she's pregnant, and everyone lives happily ever after the most tedious FanFic I've ever read in my entire life!"

* * *

_END_

* * *

Keldeo let out a long breath that sounded like air coming out of a balloon. "Gosh, tedious is the perfect word to describe this FanFic! And no, that awesome sword duel secret doesn't make up for all the nonsense in this story!"

"I didn't like the characterization_._ _None_ of these characters resemble their cannon counterparts at all. You could've done this with Zelda characters, Mario characters, or My Little Pony characters; and given them any kind of name you wanted, and it wouldn't have mattered at all, because the characters who _call_ themselves Ash, or May or Max or Misty or Paul or Giovanni or Dawn are unrecognizable! You never _once _feel that this guy who calls himself Ash really is Ash Ketchum, and you'll find yourself calling him any number of other names, 'Link' among them."

"I didn't like the characters is evil just because, and he doesn't even attempt to be an cool villain. May starts out as a useless dumb princess and then turns into a depressed Princess and then into a scheming brat that wants revenge. And Ash is just your standard player character in an RPG and doesn't have a drop of his likeable personality to the point that by the end, he's just a guy with shinning armor and a sword."

"I didn't like the setting. It's a Bizzaro World where the only Pokemon in existence are Bedrills, Ponytas, and a Charizard, Eevee, and Pikachu. It doesn't feel like a Pokemon FanFic. It feels more like _Fire Emblem_ or _Legend of Zelda_."

"I didn't like the plot points_. _They're all either jokes, like Dawn and Paul's relationship; or blatant insults, like _The Great Hunt of Debenshi,_ ., the Dragon-Type _Holocaust_. And half of these plot points are just dropped and forgotten about."

"I didn't like the conflict_. _It's a tangled mess that tries to come together at the end in a grand emergence, but only succeeds in appearing to turn off and on and skip backwards and forwards through the story. It's just another common Chosen One/Moses in the Bulrushes type story with a predictable ending."

"The only good thing I can say about this is that the fight scenes were amazing, but that good point is balanced out by the fact that this Fan Fic has little to do with Pokemon, and the stuff that it does have to do with Pokemon, it's a complete Double Slap in the face. And if I were you, I'd go read some _Fire Emblem/Legend of Zelda _and _Pokemon _Crossover Fanfiction for some comparison."

"KELDEO!" Terrakion and Meloetta shouted in disapproval.

"Wait! Wait. . ." Keldeo said, holding up a hoof to stop them. Then he said seriously, "This is just _my opinion. _I mean, the fact that I really like the Sword Duel and other fight scenes shows that this story _is _written very well. So I can completely understand why so many people love this story. Just check out the 328 reviews, and you'll see how much people love it. It's like Moulin Rouge. I can complain about it's problems until I'm blue in the face, but I can't deny that it's still very entertaining and well made. _ThatOneDwarf _is a _very, very, very _good writer." Keldeo put a hoof on his chest and smiled softly as he said with all the sincerity he could muster, "And I mean that from the bottom of my heart."

Meloetta sniffed as she wiped tears of joy from her eyes. Terrakion just looked on proudly.

Keldeo's smile suddenly disappeared. "But still. . ."

Meloetta and Terrakion simply watched Keldeo with concern as he stepped into the lake and walked through the waterfall, into the small hidden cave.

* * *

Keldeo sat alone in a cave hidden by a waterfall. The only sound was the sound of the rushing water of the falls covering the entrance, sealing him off from the outside world and leaving him alone with his thoughts.

_"Another FanFic. Another Pokemon Fic that that I disliked quick 'cause it didn't click. It makes me sick. . ."_

Keldeo sighed as he sat there, and then, he suddenly began to voice his thoughts in song.

_On and on_  
_I'm sick of moping, doping, and complaining_

_Well...not complaining but_  
_I think I'm done._

_On and on_  
_So I ripped of Nostalgia Critic for this ending._  
_For a fic I'm resenting_

Keldeo suddenly sprang up onto his hooves and stood tall.

_The review must go on!_  
_The review must go on!_  
_It's time to end this shtick!_  
_No more pretentious fics,_  
_About love or destiny!_

Keldeo reared up onto his hind legs and began to glow with golden light.

_The review must go on!_  
_The review must go on!_

Meanwhile, outside, Terrakion was laying on the ground and Meloetta was laying comfortably on top of him. She sung out loud in her sweet voice.

_Keldeo, we are still here,_  
_I'll always support you dear,_  
_Everyone sees art in a different way. . ._

The light around Keldeo burst, revealing him in his Resolute Form.

_The review must go on!_  
_The review must go on!_

Meloetta looked at Keldeo's shining silhouette through the waterfall.  
_  
_

___He's Keldeo,_  
_Colt Pokemon,_  
_He's Justified, he's brave and strong_  


_SLASH!_

Keldeo cut through the waterfall with his Secret Sword and walked over to Meloetta and Terrakion while singing strong.

_I'm neither right nor wrong. I'll sing that strong._  
_I've got my Keldeo the Critic on!_

Meloetta flew over to Keldeo song.

_Now our review is through!_

Keldeo nodded.

_Yes, that's true._

Meloetta hugged Keldeo.

_Yes we did it me and you._

Keldeo nodded again.

_That is also true._

_Meloetta the Chick is here with you_

_Well that's good for you!_  
_I've got reviewing to do._

_So what else is new?_

"Okay, we're getting to a close now!" Keldeo said finally.

Keldeo and Meloetta both took a breath sang out together.

_The review must go ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo__oooooooooooooooooooooooo-_

**_ZAP!_**

"AHH!"

Terrakion jumped in shock as both Keldeo and Meloetta were suddenly frozen in ice. He looked across and saw Georgia and her Beartic standing a few feet away. Georgia had a smug look on her face as she folded her arms proudly. "Heh. Hit _me _with a stupid Care Bear Stare, will you?"

Victini appeared next to Georgia. "Huh. Well you're welcome!"

"Whatever. Come on, Beartic. Our work here is done."

As Georgia and her Beartic left, Victini shrugged and shot a piercing gaze at the frozen Keldeo, "Well, it was worth it. That ungrateful jerk."

After Victini disappeared, Terrakion slowly turned back to Keldeo and Meloetta's frozen forms. He let out a long, sad sigh. . .

_. . . ._

_"He hated it,_

_Berated it,_

_For causing so much misery."_

**The End**

* * *

We see a close up of Keldeo and Meloetta blinking their eyes with shocked expressions on their faces as they hung stuck inside the ice with the "The End" credit hanging above them. As the screen faded to black, Zorua finished conducting the music and lowered his head when the music finally ended.

. . . . . . .

"I DIDN'T EVEN GET A LINE!" Zorua exclaimed indignantly.

* * *

_Performed by Keldeo of the Swords of Justice_

**Credits**

_Nostalgia Critic- Moulin Rouge!_

_Nostalgia Critic- Food Fight_

_______Nostalgia Critic- Sharknado_

_________Nostalgia Critic- Inspector Gadget_

_Nostalgia__________ Critic- Godzilla_

_Nostalgia__________ Critic- The Avengers_

_Nostalgia__________ Critic- TMNT_

_Nostalgia__________ Critic- Pearl Harbor_

_________My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic_

_________Between the Lions_

_________Star Wars_

_________Frozen_ by Disney_______  
_

_________The Midnight Dragon_ by Toadettegirl2012

_________Friendship is __Witchcraft_ by Sherclop Pones_______  
_

_________Portal 2_ by Valve

_Button's Adventures _by Jan Animations/Ask the Crusaders

_Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Gates To __Infinity_

_The Star Wars Holiday Specail_

_Pokemon Rumble BLAST!_

_________Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged_ by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW

_The Angry Joe Show_

_Arceus the Critic _by Imperator Justinian

_The Angry Bug Show _by DragoNiro

_Kyurem (and Cryogonal) the Critic by Mr. Grool_

_The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess_

_The Legend of Zelda: Four Swords_

_Fire Emblem_

_Pokemon X and Y_

**_Theme Song__ Inspired by "Nostalgia Critic Theme Song w/ Lyrics"_ by ShadowCloudVA**

**Special Thanks**

_BrickBoy1894/BrickBrony1894_

_Confused Matthew_

_Joshscorcher_

_That Guy With The Glasses_

_Bulbapedia_

_TV Tropes Wiki_

_Spill Reviews_

_Nintendo_

_Game Freak_

* * *

_". . .__but what killed Drake and injured me was a dragon boy."_


	7. Editorial 1- Coli Chibi's Review

_**Keldeo the Critic!**_

Keldeo reared up on his hind legs, his expression serious and his Secret Sword raised and glowing brightly.

**Keldeo the Critic- Season Three**

**Editorial**

**Coli Chibi on "A Different Kind of Princess" by Toadettegirl2012**

Hi! It's me! Keldeo the Critic! And I review Pokemon Fanfiction when I'm not training with the other Swords of Justice!

Let's talk about _"A Different Kind of Princess."_

_(The sounds of people groaning and booing can be heard. Keldeo backed off in surprise, and then frowned and waved his hooves around.)_

Alright, alright, alright! I know I complain about that Fan Fic a lot. I think I complain about it as much as _Friendship is Witchcraft. _But when a Fan Fic is _this _bad, and the author just refuses to accept any constructive criticism for it; _come on, _it just _needs_ to be talked about!

Okay, so for those of you who don't know, this story is a Negaishipping story where Ash helps Iris win a beauty contest. However, it turns out that Misty is also in the contest, and that she's _so _evil that Burgundy, Georgia, Grings Kodai, Hunter J, and even _Diamond Tiara _look up to her!

_(There is the sound of people gasping in shock)_

_(Keldeo nodded resolutely)_

Yeah, I went there! Misty is _that_ bad in this! One of the very first Pokemon protagonists is now the spawn of the Heath Ledger Joker. And if you think I'm just exaggerating, listen to this: in the latest chapter of the story, Misty hires three other girls to not only _kidnap _Iris, but also to physical torture Iris and beat the snot out of her, and possibly disfigure her face too.

_(Keldeo clenched his teeth and stomped the ground)_

How _dare _someone take Misty, the girl who risked her life to save her Gyarados, and make her do evil things! That's a huge injustice! It makes me sick!

_(Keldeo stopped stomping and breathed in and out a few times to calm himself down)_

Now, I could say a lot about this. . . but I won't.

_(Keldeo just smiled)_

I'm going to let Coli Chibi do the talking. Now, this was a review posted on the story for everyone to see, so here it is:

* * *

_Coli Chibi chapter 11 . 4h ago_

_I wouldn't call that a "big plot twist." It was really kind of obvious. Almost every girl other than Iris in this story is evil._

* * *

Which makes the whole point of the beauty contest really shallow if it's just Iris versus everyone else! Therefore, the plot only has two predictable outcomes: Iris wins and we're all happy, or Iris loses and every single reader wants Toadettegirl's head on a platter. Figuratively, of course.

* * *

_Okay, seeing as how your version of Misty is essentially the Devil made Teenage Girl, I can almost buy her sending some of her one-dimensional toadies to sabotage Iris's attempts to win. But that begs the question as to just how brain-dead said one-dimensional toadies are if they are going to just announce who sent them._

_Then again, who is the more foolish? The fools or the fool who sent them?_

* * *

So the only other characters we have here are evil idiots who are just sociopaths because they're evil, and evil because. . .just _because_ I guess! Wow, that's a great way to portray women. Yeah. . .sure. . .

* * *

_My real complaint here, other than the other stuff I've mentioned, is just how dumb the situation seems. Not only have these stereotypical snobs outright announced that they work for Misty and are going to keep Iris from competing and are willing to beat the crap out of Iris to do so. Okay, so, Iris and Misty, who are known to be rivals in the competition, are going to compete in the final round when Iris suddenly goes missing. She shows up later, bleeding and beaten, and claims that her rival sent goons to beat the snot out of her._

_Who would you believe? The girl who won because her rival wasn't present, or the rival who showed up late clearly beaten and injured with claims of the winner sending people to assault her? There would sure as heck be an investigation by the police involved._

* * *

_(Keldeo thought to himself for a moment and then spoke)_

You know what? I'd actually like to see this happen in the story. It would show just how insanely evil and stupid Misty is in this story, and reveal what a dumb idea it was to turn the awesome Season One Misty we all know and love into _Diamond Tiara!_

* * *

_Misty's only other options would to kill Iris, which would be so OOC that I don't think even you could get away with it, or keep her captive long enough to get the heck back to Kanto, and even then there would be missing person reports, an investigation, etc._

* * *

You know what else? Since Toadettegirl _clearly _doesn't know how to keep her personal bias against Misty in check, I wouldn't be surprised if she _did _have Misty try to kill Iris. Sure, everyone would hate the story, but hey! It's not like Toadettegirl cares what anyone else thinks! She's a Zeus Cervas wannabe!

* * *

_In other words, the twist wasn't very good, the generic snobs are stupid, Misty is stupid, and the whole plan is remarkably idiotic. Once again, nothing against you personally as a writer, but this is incredibly dumb._

_Just to prove I'm not just hurling mean words at you, wouldn't a better scheme have been if the generic snob henchgirls put Iris in a situation where she had to choose between the contest and her own morality? What if they faked getting a phone call from a fictional friend who was ailing with a horrible illness who needed medicine that only one pharmacy had, and that they couldn't get to it in time. What if Iris offered to help them, using her Pokemon to rush off to the pharmacy only to find that it wasn't real? That would be a better plan all around: Misty wouldn't seem suspicious, the girls could vanish before Iris returned to report that she couldn't find the pharmacy, and Iris would be too late for the final round and be disqualified. Now, of course, I'm not saying such a scheme would work, but that's how it would work in the heads of the antagonists, and that's only one example as to how the plot could be improved._

* * *

_(Keldeo broke out into a big smile)_

YES! Yes, yes, yes! That's genius! Oh, Coli Chibi, you are a genius! Moral dilemmas are always a great addition to the story. It shows the integrity of the protagonist! Oh boy, here comes Chibi's big finish! Brace yourselves!

* * *

_Another problem, one that I might have mentioned before, is the portrayal of the antagonist. Okay, I can buy Misty as an antagonist. Fine. Do that. But make her a character and not a caricature. Misty in this story isn't an understandable or likable character. She has no good personality traits. She is just a snobby jerk who exists solely to be defeated and nothing more. She is not creative. She is not interesting. She is not threatening. She is boring. She does nothing new. She has no personality other than the stereotypical archetype of what a snobby girl is. I'm not going to lie: that is not good writing, no matter what anyone says._

* * *

**_FATALITY!_**

_(Keldeo looks as if he had been blown back by an unseen force. His eyes are wide and he's still wearing a big green.)_

Wow. . .that was perfect! Chibi just tore down any justification Toadettegirl has for spitting on Misty's character. Oh but wait, there's more!

* * *

_ Wouldn't it be better for the story if Misty started out nice and joined the Princess Contest to follow in the footsteps of her deceased mother? (Hey, you never see her mother in the show, so it could work). She initially gets along fine with Iris and Ash, but as Iris quickly shows herself to be princess-worthy, Misty begins to become tempted to cheat and ultimately gives into that temptation. In the end, she would realize that her dead mother would be so dissapointed that she cheated to achieve her goal and apologize to Iris. That would be an understandable character with understandable and relatable motives rather than a caricature._

* * *

_(Keldeo backflipped with joy and his tail wagged happily)_

WOO-HOO! I would read a story like that in a heartbeat!

* * *

_I honestly think that this story could benefit from a remake. Whilst grammarwise you are a good writer, your storytelling skills need to be refined._

* * *

A remake would be perfect, because there's no salvaging this garbage. _"A Different Kind of Princess" _is a uncomfortable, unenjoyable, poorly characterized, extremely contrived, and a painful chore to read. Feel free to quote me on saying that this story is a Double Slap in the face to all of the Season One Pokemon Anime fans, and nothing more that a _poorly written Hate-Fic.__  
_

I'm Keldeo the Critic, and I review Pokemon Fanfiction.

* * *

**THE END**

_Performed by Keldeo of the Swords of Justice_

**Credits**

_Friendship is Witchcraft _by Sherclop Pones

_My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic_

_The Dark Knight_

_Mortal Kombat_

_Spongebob Squarepants_

**Special**** Thanks**

_TheMysteriousMrEnter_

_Nostalgia Critic_

_TOGProfessor_


End file.
